09.14 Diary

She came back to bed, started flipping channels, and found Clerks.  I saw that once, years ago, and was ready to see it again.
I watched, She fell asleep on and off throughout it.
It ended around 0300, and my stomach was flipping out, and I got up to see if I could find something to settle it.
Finally, asleep around 0500, I think.

Up around 1100, when She said, "Orange gookies are ready."
I got up, had two with some milk, and sat down in my chair, stomach still flipping.
She took a thermometer out into the back yard, and came back and showed me... 110 degrees.
Man.
I could not imagine getting up and ready, to make my scheduled 1400 start at work.
I knew there was coverage at work, so it would not be an inconvenience, so I sent a text to my supervisor who was at work at the time, and told him, I was having toilet issues, like needing to stay close to one, but I would be in before 1930.
He sent back one word, "Copy."
I kept sleeping, until 1715, when I got up, feeling better.
I showered and dried and dressing, preparing to leave.
She asked me if I had locked up.
A bit of a heated discussion ensued.
I told Her, we have yet to sign the Written Household and Marital Manifest Objectives, and She is not in a position to demand such a thing.
She said She was not demanding it, so much as ... suggesting it, then added, as a deterrent to masturbation.
I said, "What's the point right now, I am going to work..and am unlikely to do any masturbation there."
She said, "Well, when you get home, if you're not going to have sex with me, then..."
"That is different, and would make sense."
To be clear, I don't mind being enchaste.  Actually, to a degree, I enjoy being under Her control in that fashion.  And I do like having the masturbation deterrent,  as there have been so many times when I would have just whipped it out when the urge struck me, and started stroking.
I think I just bristled at what I considered to be an unreasonable demand.  If it's a masturbation deterrent, then why is it needed, just before I'm leaving for work?
And I was anxious to get going.  Simple as that.
Maybe...if She had brought the device to me, as I was getting out of the shower, and gently suggested, "How about this..."  I may well have been much more amenable to it.

As I was getting ready to leave, She asked, "How do you feel about CBT?"
Um.
Wrong time to ask. I was ready to go.  "I haven't tried it, really, but I think I'm open..."
Now, I'm really curious why She asked.
Really curious.
And a problem is,  She often puts out little comments like this, then forgets all about them.
While I'm busily obsessing on them.

At work 1834.
I sent Her a text "AW 1834"
She wrote back, "Great, that was FAST"
I wrote back :  "Just like sex"
She wrote back  "LIAR!"

Work...drama free (up to this writing, 0215).

HsLS  25
HsLO  25
HsLD  31
H UN  32
Her DO   ?   No


a SpankBuzz video:

F/m OTK Paddling