Oct 7

Sooooooo....    my ending remarks on yesterday's post created a bit of an upset around the house....

One was THIS post of Hers, I found on FL:
   Just woke up to discover that things aren't what I thought they were. Why am I the last to find out? Why not try to TALK to me? Don't just hand me a bowl of vanilla ice cream as I wake up.

Another clue was a text I found on my phone (not sure why I didn't hear it come in, might have been asleep...) from 07:30 :  I need to talk.  Not on the phone, but face to face.

So...

I arrived home, after my morning doctor appointment, around 11:00, VERY surprised to see Her car in the driveway, as She had a pair of morning appointments, or so I thought.

Once inside, She met me and told me, She changed them....
And, we started talking....
With Her making the observation that....
   there seems to have been a 'switch', with me taking over the dominant part of our lives....
True enough.
In order to get us to Las Vegas, get married, get back, get to Chicago, get back, and get both of us moved into this LB house...   decisions had to be made, things had to be done....  and I took over, and made decisions, and got things done.
BDSM play had been put aside....  even vanilla sex had been .... postponed?  as we took care of all this.
Trying to get back to it...well....I observed that,  pain slut or not (me...) it hurt in a bad way, when She bit me hard on my chest, about my breasts, and a 'beating' She gave me with a plastic shirt hangar also hurt, in a bad way......
So, mentally, I've just been 'out of it'.

And so, She had come to the belief that I wanted a dissolution to, or out of, and en end to .......The Contract.
And She made the decision, She said.... ...and She asked me to get on my knees, which I did...
and She came around to the front of me, and took The Collar off my neck.... and put it away, and said, when I wanted it, when I earned it, when I asked for it, I could have it back.

....So...
I was tired as all batfuck... again.... sleep deprivation is a reasonable way to some up the entirety of the previous nine days...
...and it was past time for me to check on my cats, which I couldn't fine, but I fed 'em anyway, and start on y my own dinner....

She came into my bedroom, as I was finishing... and got on the bed, and I lay next to Her, and we were just talking....  and ... 'it' started happening... She calls it 'being molested',  or  "getting friendly"...  but it led to Her Tighty Pinkies coming off Her legs, and my white Cin2 briefs coming off,  with me on top of Her, between Her spread legs, and me kind of holding Her down, but not really, as She was not exactly 'fighting' me....
And my engorged penis found its way into Her slick pussy without guidance from Her hand or mine...
Other than in one moment, She said, "It's not going to go THERE...."    and in another breath, She gasped, "UNGGG..."   and  I whispered, "How about THERE...."
After 10 minutes? 15 minutes?  of the ol' in-out, in-out,  I felt ... IT ... happening....
And.... I climaxed... came... 'gazzemed',  filled Her kit-kat with my ... sticky stuff.....
What was my mental visualization at the moments leading up to my cumming?
.....  Receiving a  hard, hairbrush spanking, while naked, over the lap of a dressed woman (such as my wife...)
Time to clean up....
She has mentioned numerous times, She would prefer I wear a 'cover'  (a cutesie-ism for a condom) so as not to fill Her pussy with cum that's just going to drip down Her thighs....  but She has not demanded I wear a cover, because it's been difficult enough to get me to cum during intercourse, and She didn't want to do anything that might make it more difficult...
So the compromise, which is the wrong word, because I enjoy it, is that I have to (GET TO) lick and eat my cum out of Her pussy.
Which I did,  willingly, greedily, happily. 

WHICH left me with about 4 hours of sleep to look forward to.........

Later, looking at FL, I found the following fetishes added to Her list:
".......... is into men that eat their own cum"
"......is into letting him eat the cum out of my pussy:"
"............is into:  being fucked roughly by the men who Love me"

It's just about 04:00, I'm at work for another two hours, and I got an erection just writing this....
maybe there's hope for me, yet.

Not all that long ago...   ( four months, maybe)...   if I got myself  aroused at work, I would know that, just wait til I get home, I could watch some porn video or clips,  or not,, maybe just close my eyes, and leisurely whack it off.
Then I met M.
...and got into a D/s contract, which came with limitations on masturbation....
 ...which led to a M/s contract, with MORE limitations...
... which evolved into sex with M,   which resulted in the ultimate limitation:  NO masturbation at all.

SOOOO,  now....   if I'm still kinda aroused by the time I leave here....
  I gotta hope She's awake and 'in the mood' when I get home, eh?      :-)
If I can stay awake....   I remember quite a few mornings, at home, alone, starting to wank... and falling asleep with my semi-erect dick in my hand,  waking up an hour or so later, and rolling over onto my side, thinking "Oh what the hell" and going back to sleep.

Wonder if a long dose of a hairbrush or bathbrush would wake me up sufficiently?