7.17 Friday Diary and Journal

Midnight: I was still awake.  
I rolled over towards Her, She rolled towards me.
We got close, we got frisky.  
We were lovin, touchin, squeezin,  each other in a way we had not done in a long time. 
It soon led to the removal of Her lacy stretch panties, for contact betwixt my tongue and her between-the-leg nether regions, which did not last long as She pulled me up, and I hurriedly yanked my thong down... and with Her guidance, entered Her...
And after not very long at all...
I did not have a stop watch running...
But not very long at all...I had my climax to go along with Her  uh several.
Possibly the fastest I have ever 'came' during intercourse with Her.
Then occurred 'clean up'.  One of my favorite parts, but ... the whole episode was a 'favorite part'.
She had started, on tv. the movie "Guardians of the Galaxy" and once the fun was over, we continued watching it to the end.
Then I asked, "Wanna watch 'Wayward Pines'"?  
She did, and we did.
Done about 02:30.   
Was time to get some sleep; She has an appointment in oh  7 1/2 hours.

I got up 7:45.  Released Donna, fed the dogs n cats,   made coffee.
It was payday for Stitch and myself, so I started looked at accounts, and figuring out whom to pay how much.
Her first alarm went off at 8, second at 830, another at 9.
She was up with the first one.
She was out at 09:30.
I continued looking at accounts, looking through mail, writing checks (IRS payments) and pondering a recurring fantasy.
I started some laundry...
And on some kinda whim...
 Actually, I wanted to see if I had all the parts...
Various cats have knocked the box containing this thing off my dresser so many times, I wasn't sure...
So I checked...then put on, a black polycarbonate chastity device, and locked it on, took a selfie, and sent it to Merry.
And changed out of the thong to white lacy-stretch panties.
This evening, in about seven hours, I was about to start a five-overnight work week, and it 'seemed' like a good time to begin a "chastity game".
I was trying to nap in my chair, then Merry and I started texting, back and forth.
She arrived home,  1245 or so....   unpacked some stuff She purchased at some supermarket,  including sugar free Gummy Bears.
Knowing the effect those have on Her, I said, "Those should help if you're constipated."
"I am, and have been for days, which is a good thing for you."
"OH, how's that?"
"I haven't pooped for days. You can lick my butthole."
Now THAT is a concept that I suspect won't have any middle ground among people's opinions.  
In my opinion, either you LIKE the idea, or you DON'T like the idea.
I ... like the idea.  I believe my anal fetish is second only to my roleplay+spanking fetish.

So,  HER saying, I can ... you know, do that with my tongue... seemed to have come right out of a particular fantasy I've been having.
For me, a fantasy in my head is like some people with musical earworms.  Like getting a song stuck in the head, and won't leave until you wake up one day and it's gone, or it's been replaced by another song.
For me it's a fantasy. Some fantasy gets stuck, and I go over and over it, until .... I write it down, or it gets replaced, or other crap in my life moves it out of the way.
Later on, in this what's going to become a lengthy post, I am going to describe this particular fantasy.
Also, remember where I wrote roleplay+spanking fetish? I'm gonna write more about that, too, later on in this post.

She had just gotten Her pubic area...and labia ... waxed, and was 'anxious' to show me.  
First She gave me a quick view, taking down Her shorts and Slinky Pinkies to show me, then suggested I get much more of a close up.
We moved into BR2... so much cooler...  She got on the bed, and ...I got a real close up,  while sucking and licking Her very smooth nether regions.  With Her guiding me, I can safely speculate, She had a very good time.  
I asked Her, what had Her so pre-aroused?  Was it leftover from last night (13 hours ago?) Or does the waxing do it for Her?  Or was it that I was in chastity and so I could only provide for Her, with 'getting any' myself?
She said, it was leftover horniness from last night, kind of as a result of me 'taking control'.  
But/And, She expects or wants more of THIS, every morning, when I come home from work, this week.....   
So we got up and off the bed.
I mentioned a desire for having my butt spanked.
She said, "Okay!" and started getting the spanking bench ready. 
Which just meant, taking the sheet off of it.
Which wasn't what I wanted at all.
And I really wanted to film any such activity, but I really didn't have time.  We still had a LOT of shopping and errands to do.
And I had loose, almost uncontrollable, bowels. 
Accidents might well...happen.
So, I explained, and said, "Never mind."
She shrugged it off, and went to the living room...computer, to start printing a shopping list.
Quite simply, I thought THAT took way more time than really necessary for just a shopping list.... I could have hand-written three in the same amount of time...but it gave me time to gather mail to ...well, be mailed, and get dressed, and  go out and put the current tag on the license plate on my car, and put my laundry from washer to dryer.
She did the first driving, from home to a branch of Chase, where I withdrew most of my pay day deposit in cash.  
She asked me to take over driving.
I drove to a WF, where She deposited cash...
THen to the closed PO across the street from there, but it had a mailbox yet open, and I dropped outgoing mail...
Then to Winco, for our primary shopping....
When we got to the frozen food area, She wandered off, and ... Sunshine came back, giggly and excited because She found the Reese's Ice Cream Cake that we had been looking all over for.
We didn't buy it then, as we had other stops to make, but now we knew were to find it.
We checked out, and then went to Von's. Winco has overall better prices, but often She gets better deals on certain items through Von's Club.
Getting ready to check out, we got stopped by a very chatty fellow about...newspaper deliver.
Now, I HAD just put in the mailbox, a postcard for LA-T delivery, but he offered a special on the local LB Sunday delivery, and I took him up on it.
We checked out, went to the car...
And Home.
I brought the many bags to the porch.  I didn't want to open the door, because of three dogs looking out the screen, waiting for their chance to escape.
Stitch came out, and helped get the bags in.
And we unpacked and put it all away.
Then I went to fetch my laundry from the dryer.
And I stripped...
Gather clothes...
Showered and dressed...
Packed up,  made a batch of iced coffee.
At the computer desk, She had reverted to Merry. I asked about it; She said that 'apparently, Sunshine doesn't like doing boring moderator stuff.'
I kissed Her goodbye, and went on out to my car.
18:13.
 Onto the 710, smack dab into the scene of some accident, just getting cleaned up by emergency vehicles.
While negotiating through that, my phone rang.
"I thought you had left your phone at home, I see one on the table bedside."
"That's my old phone, the one I had before this one I'm talking to you on..."
"oh..."
In two miles, I was past the freeway mess.
At work 19:18.
ANd could not get my head around, that this is FRIDAY.
"Saturday" was stuck in my head.  
Night work tagged out, I just had to follow through.
A thumping 65 rides for Saturday.  

Now then: 

IF we are into 'The Chastity Game', then it's up to Merry to pull a random number for the days I am to be locked up.  Since '1' would be noon/Saturday (tomorrow), then '5' would be noon/Wednesday, which should be the minimum,  and Saturday (the 25th, 8 days) the maximum. (This time, 5 to 8 days... we may go for longer periods, as we acclimate, and I determine that this device is wearable for long periods).  
So, a random number between 5 and 8, inclusive, please?

About  roleplay+spanking:
I've been thinking a bunch about our relationship, which has gone through many changes and alterations.  
I've been thinking about what I want.
I've been trying to figure out why I've been doing so much fantasizing about what I want,  which is pretty much exactly what I did when I lived with an ex-girlfriend, then a (late)wife, then an ex-girlfriend, then alone... 
And now I have a wife who is as delighted to spank my naked bottom as I am to have Her do it.

So, what's the fuckin' problem, Shilo?

Well....

  I am not a submissive.  I'm easy to get along with, when it comes to choices to be made.  But when shit needs doing, and nobody else is doing it, I will and I do take control.
 I am not a slave.  My gut still hurts, thinking of when the word was applied to me.
 At home, in the real world, anyway.  

  I'm still quite willing to 'go along' on Fet, or at parties, as being Her submissive/slave.  It's ... a role to play.

We tried having a Female-led Relationship with DD.
The 'rules' we had in place were... well, common sense and common courtesy.  
As for the Domestic Discipline:  
 I've come to believe that DD has no 'real' place between consenting adults.  
When one of 'em does 'something wrong' it should be talked out.
As in,   
 "You left the toilet seat up."
"I did? Omigod, I'm sorry."
"Okay, try to remember, please."

As opposed to a different conversation, in what I imagine to be the real world:
 "You left the toilet seat up."
"I did? Omigod, I'm sorry."
"I am going to spank you for forgetting."
"What?  The FUCK you are."

THAT, I imagine is the conversation between 'real' adults, 
unless one has some kind of strong power over the other  (financial, threat of leaving...) or, one has agreed to the power exchange. Which happens.   But I don't really get it.

But, DD doesn't work in OUR relationship, because spanking is neither discipline nor punishment.
I enjoy it too much.
So, if punishment is supposed to be "an action given as consequences for unwanted behavior, meant to be a deterrent against such behavior recurring" ... 
   it doesn't work on me.  
If the punishment is corporal in nature, I enjoy it ...afterwards... maybe not during, while being applied...  and would not be a deterrent.  
I'm also quite stubborn. I'm capable of repeating the behavior, simply as a passive-aggressive acting out.

I simply believe in keeping it REAL in the relationship.  If I exhibit behavior that bother Her, She needs to talk to me.  
And vice versa.

THE problem .... eh, make that A problem, there may well be others ...  is : She knows, and I know.
She knows that ...I am a masochist, that I enjoy the impact play.
And I know that I am a masochist, that I enjoy it.
My fantasy world is a place where I am not self-aware.  Where I am spanked by a Dominant Other, who does it for discipline and punishment, and possibly her own kind of pleasure,  and I don't know ...for sure... that I ... kinda ... like it.
My fantasy world is a place where I'm in a relationship with a Woman who has Authority.
Call her 'Mom' or 'Stepmother' or 'Aunt' or 'Governess'.  and I am a ..well, a young man.  
She has Authority and when She declares, "It's time for a spanking" I am in no position to refuse.

So, it's been 25.5 months since our first date.
In that time, we (rather quickly) signed a D/s contract.
And equally quickly, and at my urging for fear of being cast aside, signed an M/s contract.
And got married.
And converted all to an FLR-DD contract.
And due to my abdominal health,  put all such things aside for a bit.
ANd when we returned, .... we realized, we like, or really, I like, videotaping our activities for posterity,  and realized, we just might make a bit of money, selling the clips on clips4sale.
Since then, nearly all our impact-play sessions have been done for the purpose of taping and putting them on our site.
We've done mostly roleplay for those clips,  pretending, for the sake of our audience, to be a couple engaging in FLR-DD. 

And THAT is what I mean, when I state that roleplay+spanking is at the top of my fetish list.

I do not want Her to declare an intention to spank me because 'I deserve it'.  I simply don't think that option exists.
She CAN (may...) declare an intention to spank me because  ...  She likes to, and knows I like it.  
Even better, to do it with camera rolling.

What kind of roleplay?
Well, as of right now, I've written out 84 scenarios, suitable for videorecording.

ANYTHING that takes the scene out of this 'real world', where punishment and discipline does not exist between adults, and into my imaginary fantasy world.

Although there will certainly by time for the occasional spontaneous not-recorded 'fun' spanking.

One 'might ask, if you're not in a D/s or M/s relationship, why do you involved in chastity play?
Because... She likes to have that control over me, and I like to cede that control to Her.
I know about myself that if/when I'm not in chastity, I'm tempted to take it into my own hand, whenever the whim strikes me that circumstances allow.   (During recent health issues, I've had NO interest in such.  I've noticed that in these days that I have felt better, my sexual appetite is returning.) However, being allowed to cum too much (for me) results in a decreased interest in Her.
Being in chastity aids in keeping me aroused and interested in Her.
However, She enjoys intercourse, with me, WAY too much, for me to "worry" about becoming "one of those men" who claim to be locked up for months at a time.

And finally:
 About a thousand words ago, I mention my recent earworm-of-a-fantasy.
 I'll write about it here, just so I can get it out, and move on to another one.
  In the present tense:

Somewhere (details vague) I meet an older woman. By that, I mean, clearly older than me.  She may be married but looking for something on the side, or separated/divorced/widowed.  Experienced but ... looking for something.   Maybe we meet on line, as it's easier, perhaps, to talk about intimate details when you're not face to face.
And we talk about what we would want if we could have a random hook-up,  and got to do just what we wanted.
She tells me that what she loves ... is to have her anus kissed, and licked, to have a man's tongue stuck into it as deep as he can get it in ...  followed by a finger, or two, then a dildo to open it up, followed by the man's cock, slow and easy in, til it's in all the way, then slowly ouuuut, then innnnnn,   until she is pushing back on it, urging him to go faster and harder with each thrust...   while her right hand is between her legs, rubbing her clit in rhythm with the anal pounding... until she gasp and moans in orgasm after orgasm ...and feels the man ejaculate into the condom stretched around his cock.  Then he pulls it out and continues to lick her anus and her pussy and clit, until she moans and says she's had enough.
I reply, 'Wow what's wrong with that, I got aroused thinking about it'.  
She says, 'I've known a man ...or two...that just were not into anything anal.  A bit of disappointment.'
"Oh, too bad," I say.
"And you?" she asks.
"Nothing...sexual, at all.  I want a dominant woman, like a ..a stepmother, who beats my bottom, for any offense, or just for discipline,  whether it's over her knee, while she uses a hairbrush, or with me bent over a chair or bed, while she uses paddle or strap or cane.  Just your basic home style punishment for a so called naughty boy."
"Ohhhhh, well..."
In short time, we get together... her place or mine or a hotel room. 
She gets what she wants, and I get what I want.
We go separate ways, satisfied.
We get together frequently, weekly or so. 

sl Sex        11 H
sl Org        11 H
sl F4Me       368 H
sl F4Her      368 H
Unlocked    109 D
Locked            1/2 D
sHl DO         10 H
sl CI            233 D
GlutenFree  58.33 D
sHlDate         3.5 D
S l MorP      73 H


Caption by me: