Tuesday, December 30, 2014

12.30 Thought for the Day...Anything?

Anything???

“As long as I keep you from having an orgasm, you'll agree to do anything I want?” The answer to that question when asked of a man on the edge of orgasm is invariably, “Yes.”

Don't believe me? Try it sometime! Of course, once he has had an orgasm his entire attitude will, most likely, change. That is, unless it is something he doesn't mind doing in the first place. For example, many men are willing to drink their own cum, so asking him to do that might not change with an orgasm. But what about sucking another man's cock? Not many will do that without the proper incentive. In fact, I have found that most women who actually want their partner (slave, subbie, boy toy, or what have you) to do something often ask this question in the wrong way or at the wrong time.

What do I mean by that? Here's an example of asking the wrong question (or asking in the wrong way); “Will you suck another man's cock if I let you cum?” Do you see how that puts his reward before he has completed his part of the bargain? Instead, try putting the question to him as a statement this way; “I will let you cum if you first suck another man's cock.” Or, “You can have an orgasm as soon as you have sucked another man's cock.” See the difference? If you really want your victim to perform something he would not ordinarily do (perhaps something humiliating) promise him a reward only after he has completed the task, not before.

I know that many woman have difficulty learning to talk erotically to their partners during sex. Because of this, they tend to be timid when it comes to psychological torment. You may never want your partner to suck another man's cock (just for example) but making him think that you will can be very sexually arousing to him. Obviously, if you are only attacking his psyche with your play, you would want to ask the question differently. Instead of making him perform the task before his reward, you simply want him to agree to complete that task. That is, you want him to say that he will suck another man's cock (or drink his own cum, or dress like a woman, or whatever the task is) before receiving his reward, especially if you don't plan on making him actually follow through.

Ladies, please understand the difference. Every man who enjoys being sexually teased (and they all do) has fantasies of things he would love to be “forced” to do. He also has a list of things that he likes to fantasize about being forced to do but would never really do under any circumstances. Your job, as his tormentor, is to learn what these things are and which are which. Then, and only then, can you really keep your partner on his toes and torment his mind, as well as his body, properly.

In answer to all the questions I've received on the subject... Yes you can make your guy agree to just about anything as long as you keep him from having that orgasm.

Mistress Ivey

Diary Monday 12.29

Off work  06:20.... home  07:15.

She was not home, having left to take babybear home.

I fed all the animals...and started on my own DM of leftover lasagna, bread, chips....   as She arrived home.  
She announced that She was ill,  with 'stuff' emerging from Her in ways that is contra-indicative of normal body functions and excretions, and went to bed.
I finished up, and followed Her... in bed,  0800ish.

1315, up for P & S... She was up, sitting at Her computer...  we talked a few minutes, I went back to bed.

1715 Up, talking with Her, eating an apple...dressed.... 

1820 in car...
 Stopped at a 7-11 on Santa Monica and Las Palmas...
 Office  19:20. 

Really easy night...   finished with '48' for Monday, starting with '45' for Tuesday...   
 MT, my co worker of the evening, and a co-supervisor, asked me if I was willing to work Friday or Saturday overnight.... 
I asked, why, and she confided to me that the 'other' overnight guy was gonna be let go on Friday,  because, one of our account holders called in, saying she was going to pull her whole account, because this person was so rude to her. 
 Ding dong the Witch is dead, the Witch is dead, the Witch is dead
And we discussed ideas for getting the set up done, during the event-filled calendar of January....
And made plans for a card game get together on Thursday.

H sl S   300
H sl O  971
H sl D  972
H  un  921
Her DO  No
D sl CI  35

A comment was placed on my journal entry of 12.29,  stating...among other things, that I have a choice of  " ...lowering expectations or  feeling dissatisfied / unsatisfied".
Well...
  I have no intentions of 'settling', i.e.,  of lowering my expectations.
And so, IF the other thing mentioned really is the only other choice... 
  so be it.  

12.30 Thought for the day.... IMHO how it should be done

http://needherdiscipline.tumblr.com/post/104681515986#

Monday, December 29, 2014

12.29 Thought for the day


From the blog: A Man in my position
Of course we’re going to Church,” said the Lady of the House six minutes before the service began in our wonderful little Church seven minutes from our front door. I’m afraid I said something a bit disrespectful as to Hannah’s lateness. As we walked at speed to Church she leaned over to me, “And when we get home we’ll take care of your snarky comment.”
Church passed quickly and we soon were walking home. Hannah had enjoyed the service and we had fun dissecting the sermon. And, truth to tell, I was pretty sure Hannah had forgotten all about my remark. I was wrong. As I took off her coat she said, “You can go up to your corner and wait for me. Don’t bother apologising. I really should have whipped you before we went to Church and you could have enjoyed a well welted bottom on the pew for an hour. But we’ll make up for that now.”
I did as I was told and about fifteen minutes later I heard Hannah coming up the stairs. “You can get into position.” was all she said.
I knelt on our bed. No warm up. Just strokes of the heavy rattan cane. First half a dozen medium and then, with only a second’s pause to adjust her position six full swings of the cane. I was grunting after two and I could feel the welts rising. The last two strokes crossed the first four as Hannah swung her cane on the diagonal.
“There.”she said standing back and admiring her work, “If I am running late it is none of your business. And those welts will remind you to speak respectfully. Now pull up your girdle and we can have coffee.”
I am very loved indeed.

12.29 Journal

According to my Numbers Log, it's been 948 hours. 

That's 39 1/2 days....  since the last 'real' 'good' spanking She gave me.

By that, I mean there have been a few minor incidents... such as when we were sitting in the living room, and She said 'get over my knee', or I was in the bathroom, naked and out of the shower, and She grabbed the hairbrush and smacked my butt a few times.

But a real session, that left my bottom bruised and crimson  (and we videotaped for our clips4sale site) happened ...  nearly 40 days ago.

We did not stop due to lack of desire, on Her part.  There were times when She suggested ..even "ordered" it... and I seem to recall a time or two of flatly refusing.  
We were at my parents' house for nearly five days, and did not do a darned thing this year; the previous year, we were doing twice-a-days.

All because of me and this mysterious I.B.S illness,  with symptoms of a chronic pain in my gut, somewhere below my stomach.  

A visit to the doctor did not help much.  
She suggested, stress...and try to learn to relax.
Well, so much easier said than done.

I've missed quite a bit of work,  the pain has been so ...annoying.

I have not been aroused by anything, the pain has been so much.  I had plenty of piss hard-ons during this period, but once I urinated, it disappeared, and I really had no ideas or thoughts about physical pleasures during this time.

Well, it has subsided quite a bit.

Not completely, not all gone...but close.   

During this period of abstinence, She and I had ... talks, during which She told me, She had not entered our marriage looking for a strictly vanilla one...  that She enjoys beating my bottom... She enjoys beating any willing bottom, but mine in particular... and doesn't want to have to fulfill this need outside of our marriage, but if it really comes down to it...if I insist on sticking to vanilla, She might go looking outside and elsewhere to scratch this particular itch.

Do I feel threatened by that?  
Of course not.  
I just don't 'do' jealousy.

I remember telling Her, that when we do get back into the DD/CP, I would only 'allow' it if we were filming it, for use on our c4s site. 
And, not while Tallship was in the house.
This last week, Tallship has been doing a fair job of making himself scarce for some hours on a daily basis.
BUT, we've had Her twenty-something-year-old son at the house since Tuesday or so...  nearly a week...  which severely limited ANYTHING we might have considered doing.

She is taking that son home, or to school, one or the other, doesn't matter which, but probably home, so he can drop off his bags... early this morning.  

So, am I ready to resume DD/CP etc etc when I get home from work, when She gets home....   ?

Well...no...not really....

There is still the issue I am having of...
  my unfulfilled fantasies.
I've had hundreds of fantasies go through my head...and I've written close to a hundred of them into scenes ... that we were going to use as special treats... back when we were doing 'treats'.  (Which lasted, about three minutes, as I recall.)
  There are scenarios that can bring forth instant arousal within me (or could, when my gut wasn't hurting).
 I've yearned for the longest time to play out these scenarios, to enact these fantasies...  and a few time, we've... come close.  
 So close...
 BUT when I get that close... yet not quite there...I feel like... I'd asked for a pizza with pepperoni and sausage and onions and bell peppers, and told, I can only get one with just cheese.  
 Should I settle for the plain cheese pizza, or should I say, "Nah, I'll get something else?"
 I don't typically 'settle'.  If I can't have what I want the way I want it,  I'm most likely to decline whatever is offered instead, and wait for whatever it is I exactly want, even if it's not necessarily forthcoming SOON.

But compromise?  Yeah, I can do that.
I might take the plain pizza NOW, if I'm told I'll get the one with the works NEXT time.

Here's a thing:
I'm not entirely sure what the hell I'm talking about.

I'm trying to say, I am really torn between WANTING to get back into the DD/CP lifestyle, and NOT wanting to.
I realize, I am NOT fond of thinking myself a 'slave' ...
Or even a 'submissive husband'.
I think we've had enough discussions to make THAT clear.

BUT I enjoy having my bottom beaten ..by Her. 
I would enjoy doing roleplays that fit that lifestyle.
But I am too self-willed, headstrong, stubborn,  etc..   to actually LIVE and BE that sub/slave.

What to do, what to do?












Diary Sunday 12.28

UP 0500,  P and S
UP noon...when She woke me, asking what I wanted to eat....
Got up, fed the small dogs, fed the cats... ate a banana and cinnamon toast, and took pills,  
And went to the toilet..again and again...
THEN She spilled a glass of water on the keyboard of Her computer...and I went about seeing what I could do to fix that....
And finally felt like I could get up and go.
Sunshine had sat down at the table with Stitch to play CAH, and they brought in her two dollies to play, also.
I kissed her good bye, went out to my car...
And stopped for gas...
And was at work, about 1530.

The night work was not 'dead',  but kind of like moving chess pieces on a board to make them fit in the right place....
My associate, MT, bailed around 2100 as the next day's work was so... minimal...

H sl S  276
H sl O  947
H sl D  948  
H UN  847

Her DO  No

D sl C  34

Diary Sat 12.27

Awake 0300  Pee then pie.

Up around 1030...  pee... then coffee and orange rolls..and newpaper.
Started laundry...  put dishes away...  cleaned the chamber pot...  scooped the back yard...  
Showered, dried, dressed...
Talked with Her a minute...
and in my car 1345..
To the bank,  where I waited around to see a banker and took the two ATM cards I had in my possession and assigned them the same PIN.
Then I went to VZW store... I am out of contract on my phone, and wanted to talk about options...
The best option, according to the CSR, an online option of getting a certain phone with a table.  
I accepted that, and moved on....   
Stopped at Harbor Freight, to redeem a coupon for a free pack of 20 AA batteries...
Then a CVS, to get the AZO that She did not get for herself...
Then an Office Max for a pen/pencil bag....
and home 1715, where She was napping in bed next to Babyman.
We discussed dinner, kicked around some options, and decided on Sizzler.
The four of us left, sometime after 1800...
And returned home,  2030...
And at Her request, sat down for another game of CAH.
Over at 2245...
And we adjourned to the bedroom, to watch a movie or two.
The first one was "Ten Things I hate about you"  which, when I first heard about it, I had confused with "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days".   
  Having seen it, I'll say, it was much better... 'tho I have not seen the other one yet.
Then, we watched "Constantine" which I saw in the theater, own on DVD , seen a couple times on cable, but Merry had not seen yet, so we watched it.
   And bed time... 03:15.

H sl S 252
H sl O  923
H sl D  924
H UN  873
HER DO  NO
D sl CI  33