9.06 On chastity "It's your fantasy"

9.05 Saturday Diary

01:30 awake...
03:30 awake
05:30 awake
6:45 Up  
  toilet...shower, dress, toilet....
Make coffee... Kiss Merry good bye..
in car 7:38...
at work  8:15.

Labor Day weekend...  a long, slow, drama free day at work...

Out 19:17
Home 20:00.

Merry wasn't home: I asked Stitch, he said "well, soon.... and dinner is in the oven"
And I looked outside, and saw Her and Bullfrog walking up the side walk.
I undressed and stretched out on the bed waiting.
Dinner was soon served.
I ate and watched "Sex & Drugs & Rock & Roll"

And went to sleep 2200?

58  H s l S
58  H s l O
59  H s l Fun/Her or me
564 H Un
58   H s H l O
283  D s m l Ci
43  D  gluten free
644 H s H l Date
22 D  s l P or M

9.05 Chastity, living the lifestyle

Living the Male Chastity Lifestyle

There are many compelling reasons why a couple
would want to incorporate the male chastity lifestyle into their relationship. 

• 1. Male chastity is easily one of the most erotic fantasies that a man can possibly have. The woman who can make it ‘real’ for him will have his everlasting attention, interest and loyalty.
• 2. For couples who have an otherwise loving relationship but find that the romance and sex have lost their luster, a chastity device can liven things up a LOT.
• 3. For men who are in the habit of adopting a distant and disdainful demeanor immediately after sex, male chastity will change all of that…. real quick!
• 4. For the woman who is sexually frustrated by his lack of staying power or his overall disinterest in her pleasure, the chastity lifestyle can provide all the sexual enjoyment and satisfaction the she could ever hope for.
• 5. The female often gets stuck with doing most, if not all, of the housework. When she takes the prerogative of locking him up in a male chastity device, that dynamic turns completely around. Now he is doing all of the housework…. and more.
• 6. If he happens to have a masturbation problem (as many males do), then that issue is immediately solved with male chastity. The only time he will be jerking off now is under strict supervision and for her amusement and entertainment purposes only.
• 7. For the female who appreciates being adored and receiving lots of male affection, watch out! A chastised male will be giving you much more attention than you bargained for.
• 8. After hundreds and thousand of years of psychological and physical programming, males have been conditioned to want, expect and even need an orgasm every two or three days (at least). Male chastity effectively re-programs the male mind to place the emphasis on her satisfaction instead of his.
• 9. Men appreciate the anticipation and romance that leads up to sex just as much as women do. Using a male chastity device extends that erotic anticipation and puts him on a perpetual high that only ends when she decides that it ends. His female keyholder is actually giving him what he really wants and craves.
• 10. The male chastity lifestyle actually affirms and supports what everyone already knows is true; men are easily controlled and manipulated with sex. A smart woman takes advantage of this weakness in the makeup of the male and becomes a master manipulatress using male chastity as her preferred instrument of control…. all with his (initially anyway) approval.

Want to bring the fun, adventure and intimacy back into your relationship?

There’s no better way to accomplish that than to begin practicing long term orgasm denial (for him). To effectively do that, you will need a male chastity device which you can find right here.

9.04 Friday Diary

Awake and asleep and awake  
Cookie on the bed off the bed on the bed.... Oy
Merry, up around 6, to take Stitch to work...
 (and pick up Bullfrog and his daughter etc...)
I was awake, 0630, started watching The Newsroom
And fed the animals..
Made some coffee.
Watched The Newsroom
Sitting at the computer desk.
Creating screen caps from Thursday's vid.
Posted some on FLR-DD on yahoo...
And on cyberspankings ...  and moved 'em to the flashdrive
Updated my diaries...

Eventually She returned home...

I started Laundry 
She went to pick up Stitch, who got off work at 13:00.

To BR1, and nap   1400 to 1800

And She left with Bullfrog to ...go somewhere else...

I read Thursday's paper.
Put laundry in dryer.
Watched The Newsroom.
She called, said, She wouldn't be home til 2200 2230 .
I opened a can of beef stew for dinner
Brought my laundry in...and away.
And watched The Newsroom.
As She returned home, 2200.
Done with the show, I went to sleep, 22:30.

34  Hr s l S
34  Hr s l O
35  Hr s l Fun (Her or me)
540 Hr UN
34  Hr s Her l DO
282 D s MY l Ci
42 D gluten free
620 Hr s Her l Date
21 D since l P or M

9.04 On chastity teasing and non-orgasmic activites

Non-orgasmic activities #2

Ok, you have him naked and on his back. Remove his cage. Once uncaged, masturbate him. Watch him carefully. If you want, tell him to let you know when he is close. You can tell him that if he has an “accident” he will stay locked with no teasing for a month. Get him to help you, but don’t necessarily believe him in the beginning.

Tease him any way you want. The objective is to get him close to orgasm without letting him get release. Getting him very aroused is just as good as bringing him right to the edge. While he may think it is for his fun, your real objective is to keep those hormones flowing and reminding his body of what it is missing. You can do this over and over as many times as you want. If you keep it up long enough, he will actually lose the ability to come for a while. Just remember, no orgasms until his release date!

When you are done, lock him up again and have him lick or finger you to as many orgasms as you like. 

Non-orgasmic activities #1

Many males believe that they will always be horny. If you lock them up and ignore them, they think that their desire to get off will continue to grow. This is true up to a point, but the fact is that if a man or woman is not sexually stimulated, over time the desire for sex will diminish and eventually disappear.  That’s why regular, non orgasmic sexual activities are needed to keep him wanting.

It may seem cruel, but a key component of enforced chastity is to keep your caged male in a continuous state of heat. Every day without an orgasm should feel like it is lasting forever and he should grow more and more desperate for release. That, after all, is the real core of all those chastity fantasies. The way to do this is through regular non-orgasmic teasing.

Most keyholders become expert cock teases. They learn how to bring their males within millimeters of an orgasm and then stopping. This is a technique every new keyholder must develop. The most common, and easiest way, is by masturbating him. The setup for this is up to you. Some keyholders restrain the male’s hands during this activity. Most don’t. Males have to exercise self control.

A ruined orgasm is another way of asserting control over the male

The most pleasurable element of male orgasm isn’t the orgasm itself, but the heightened sensitivity of the penis, particularly the glans, during orgasm.

 If all sensation is denied the moment the orgasm starts, the pleasure is reduced by a good 80%. A ruined orgasm also often leaves the male feeling slightly unsatisfied and eager for more reward, which is a better option for keeping him in the proper mindset.

9.03 chastity for couples

Enforced chastity 

The main point of enforced chastity is to transfer control of the caged male’s sexual pleasure from him to his keyholder. It is a power exchange. As keyholder you need to maintain his sexual desire throughout his waiting time. He has to be desperate for release in order for him to truly feel sexually controlled. To keep him that way, you will need to stimulate him on a regular basis without providing him the opportunity to orgasm or ejaculate.

An ultimate expression of your power is to replace his scheduled orgasm with a ruined one. This is very frustrating to the male and will imprint strongly that you, in fact, own his pleasure. Since ruined orgasms do reset his physical need for orgasm, if not his mental one, they should not be intentionally given before his scheduled release date.

Sex for you is independent of his pleasure. You should use him to give you orgasms whenever you desire them. If you want intercourse without him ejaculating, you will have to train him to hold back. This can be done through punishment for accidents and with training aids: multiple condoms and/or numbing cream.

Your male has asked you to control his ability to get sexual pleasure. It’s up to you to assert that control and have fun in the process!

Transfer of Sexual Control

The entire point of being caged is the transfer of sexual control to the keyholder. In many cases, the caged male ends up waiting for orgasms longer than he would if he could take things into his own hands.

Locked in a cock cage - masturbation is not an options.

Sex for the keyholder #1

As keyholder, all this male sex and teasing may make you horny. One of the best benefits of having a caged male is his interest in providing you with lots of orgasms. His wish to do this is driven by two powerful forces: 

One is his desire to convince you to get him off. In his mind, giving you an orgasm might put you in the mood to give him one. 

The other reason is more subtle; giving you orgasms is sex and even though he doesn’t get to come, he can still experience the pleasure of giving you orgasms.

Regardless of his state of waiting, feel free to have him provide you with sexual attention whenever you want. But, don’t let him push you into getting more attention than you desire. 

A lot of males will try to deal with their frustration by convincing their keyholders to orgasm frequently. Take sex from him when you want, not when he wants.

Sex for the keyholder #2

One tricky subject is intercourse. Up to now the only male stimulation we have talked about is using your hand to masturbate him. There is a good reason for this: Any other form of stimulation is very difficult to control and will likely result in an unplanned “accident” for him. So in the beginning, any non-orgasmic sex for him should probably be restricted to your hand.

Some keyholders train their males to hold back orgasms. They do this by having their males penetrate them and provide only the keyholder with an orgasm. This is tough for males to do. All of us have been conditioned to come when we are ready. If you want to train him not to come, you will have to add punishment to your chastity activities. 

He has to know that an “accident” will result in punishment. Many keyholders spank males immediately after they have an accident. This is no play spanking. A hairbrush or paddle is used to provide a very painful lesson each time he comes without permission. Since his accident removed his interest in sex for a while, the spanking will be pure punishment with no sexual overtones.

Sex for the keyholder #3

If you are inclined to do Intercourse training , you can help your male learn with some teaching aids. One good one is the use of condoms. A couple of condoms will reduce his sensitivity and make it easier for him to control himself. Another good one is desensitizing cream. These creams like Oragel contain Novocaine or other anesthetics that actually numb the penis and eliminate any pleasurable sensation from intercourse. 

If you do use a numbing product on him, wait at least ten minutes after applying it before you let him inside you.  It takes at least that long for the anesthetic to take full effect Also, put a condom on him or the cream left on his penis will put your vagina to sleep. 

There is nothing wrong with training aids to help him learn to use his penis for your pleasure, not his. By the way, if you numb him too much he will lose his erection and be unable to get one again until the anesthetic wears off.

9.03 Thursday Diary

...and watched "The Newsroom"
She asked about giving me a spanking, I said, "seems kinda late" ... so She said, "How about spanking me?"
So, over my lap She went, and I smacked Her bare buttocks with my hand... not hard, no so light that She wouldn't feel it, but enough so that She wouldn't call quits too quickly... 
Then She did call quits...
Rolled onto Her back,  and I gave Her oral intercourse, and we had sex, and I gave Her more oral... until She passed out, was snoring.
I helped Her get Her mask on, and got Her to sleep... 0400.
I tried to sleep, nothing doing.
The plan was for Her to take Stitch to work this morning, rather than have him ride his bike...
But since She was finally asleep and I was not, I got up around 0600,  got myself ready while he was getting ready, and off we went.
And back home, 0700.  
I let Donna out, and fed the dogs.
Back to the bedroom, tried to sleep, and we talked...
And up, moved into the living room.
Around noon, we started talking about filming, and moved into BR2.
It took way too long to get the camera focused 'just' the way She wanted, and I was within seconds of standing up and saying, "Maybe another time..."
But She got the camera the way She wanted it...
and we shot about 9 minutes of video, in two clips, with a pause in between, while She put a band aid on a slightly bleeding spot on my left buttock... which I'm tentatively calling "Lesson Learned"  but still leaving the title-decision up to Her for posting on our clips4sale site.
Done with that about 13:00, and began the process of uploading from camera to dropbox, then converting from HD to mp4.
In the meantime as I sat in a living room chair, something came up, and we moved into BR1 and She did not need oral warm up: She started by getting on top of me, before then rolling on Her back, and me mounting Her, which resulted in a rare Happy ending for me.   ..... (1430)
I took my contact lenses out, as my right out was bright red.
She got Herself ready to go pick up Stitch AND meet with Bullfrog, and show Him the Household Agreement She had drawn up.
Printing it was a minor problem, but we got it done.
She left, and I was more than ready to get some sleep.
I started in my easy chair, until I was hungry enough to get a snack...
Then moved into the BR...

She returned home with Stitch AND Bullfrog.
She went out again to Walmart to get a prescription...while I slept...

She returned home ...
And announced dinner was ready...
For me,  nacho like chips, covered in beef and sauce. 
I ate, and watched more "The Newsroom" 
And went back to sleep..... 

10 H   s l Sex
10 H   s l Org
11 H   s l Fun for Me and Her
516 H   Unlocked
10 H   s Her last DO
281 D  s M L ci
41  D   gluten free
596 H  s Her last date, and I think She's avoiding him
20 D   s our l P or M 
 2       clips produced (1 long clip, cut into half)
1/2  D   Child living with us.