Sunday, March 23, 2014
Saturday, March 22, 2014
3.21 Diary
Some days I pray for Silence,
Some days I pray for Soul,
She came into bed around 0100, after waiting til the usual last minute to start writing a report She needed for Her group, the coming night.
I was up 0230 for pee and snack...
and kindawake 0930 for coffee, snack, pills...
Then back to sleep from 10 to 12, when the installer for the back door screen door arrived.
I was up for good, and recorded mail and bills... until he left.
Then we dressed and were in my car 1330, headed to the bank to deal with some snafu.
It took about an hour, but it got done...
Then we did grocery shopping, as She decided what She was going to cook and serve tonight.
We went home, and unpacked groceries, and I showered, and suggested She get to cookin', and as I dressed, She was starting to cook.
I got in my car, and went to pick up Mb, and bring her back to the house.
Back at the house, She asked me to take Stitch to the Temple so he could begin setting up for dinner.
Which I did, and returned, and they were ready to go. I packed up the car, and we went back to the Temple.
I unpacked the car....and dinner was served....
And after dinner, She went into Her meeting, and I found a well-lighted place to update my notebook...and I took a nap from 2050 to 2130...and woke up for 'dessert'.
Then I went with Her to take an inventory, to see what supplies She would need for an upcoming dinner, and She took me to see the Inner Sanctum, so I could see what is entailed in setting it up, and back in the main room, She pulled out Her book,and showed me an official diagram.
She changed clothes, from Her formal dress to Her regulars...and I hung up Her formal wear on the hangars...then I packed up the car....
And She bitched at me for not bringing Her, the coat from the car....
And we left.
I dropped Stitch at the house, and we continued on.
I dropped Mb at home, and helped her upstairs with her stuff...and then went home.
I brought all the stuff in from the car.
I unpacked, and made room in the fridge...
And emptied the dishwasher...
And scrubbed the pans that She had baked the meatloaf...
While She was making Her own dessert...yogurt and strawberries.
Without a word of acknowledgment for the work I did, She walked away, leaving Her empty yogurt containers on the counter.
Feeling a whole lot of resentment, I took my pills and adjourned to my bedroom....
Little-s came in, and I said, "I don't feel well, so I'm just saying, if you'd prefer to sleep with Stitch tonight, it's okay with me."
"No, I want to be here, in case Tsu comes in..."
She came in and lay down....
HsLO 420 1/2
HsLS 173 1/2
HsLD 39
D UN 87
Times with That DIrty Slut None, zero, zip
Days under public punishment 28
Lyric for the day:
Some days I just pray to the God of Sex and Drums and Rock 'N' Roll.
Some nights I lose the feeling,
Some nights I lose control,
Some nights I just lose it all when I watch you dance and the thunder rolls.
Maybe I'm lonely, And that's all I'm qualified to be,
There's just one and only, The one and only promise I can keep.
Some days I pray for Soul,
She came into bed around 0100, after waiting til the usual last minute to start writing a report She needed for Her group, the coming night.
I was up 0230 for pee and snack...
and kindawake 0930 for coffee, snack, pills...
Then back to sleep from 10 to 12, when the installer for the back door screen door arrived.
I was up for good, and recorded mail and bills... until he left.
Then we dressed and were in my car 1330, headed to the bank to deal with some snafu.
It took about an hour, but it got done...
Then we did grocery shopping, as She decided what She was going to cook and serve tonight.
We went home, and unpacked groceries, and I showered, and suggested She get to cookin', and as I dressed, She was starting to cook.
I got in my car, and went to pick up Mb, and bring her back to the house.
Back at the house, She asked me to take Stitch to the Temple so he could begin setting up for dinner.
Which I did, and returned, and they were ready to go. I packed up the car, and we went back to the Temple.
I unpacked the car....and dinner was served....
And after dinner, She went into Her meeting, and I found a well-lighted place to update my notebook...and I took a nap from 2050 to 2130...and woke up for 'dessert'.
Then I went with Her to take an inventory, to see what supplies She would need for an upcoming dinner, and She took me to see the Inner Sanctum, so I could see what is entailed in setting it up, and back in the main room, She pulled out Her book,and showed me an official diagram.
She changed clothes, from Her formal dress to Her regulars...and I hung up Her formal wear on the hangars...then I packed up the car....
And She bitched at me for not bringing Her, the coat from the car....
And we left.
I dropped Stitch at the house, and we continued on.
I dropped Mb at home, and helped her upstairs with her stuff...and then went home.
I brought all the stuff in from the car.
I unpacked, and made room in the fridge...
And emptied the dishwasher...
And scrubbed the pans that She had baked the meatloaf...
While She was making Her own dessert...yogurt and strawberries.
Without a word of acknowledgment for the work I did, She walked away, leaving Her empty yogurt containers on the counter.
Feeling a whole lot of resentment, I took my pills and adjourned to my bedroom....
Little-s came in, and I said, "I don't feel well, so I'm just saying, if you'd prefer to sleep with Stitch tonight, it's okay with me."
"No, I want to be here, in case Tsu comes in..."
She came in and lay down....
HsLO 420 1/2
HsLS 173 1/2
HsLD 39
D UN 87
Times with That DIrty Slut None, zero, zip
Days under public punishment 28
Lyric for the day:
Some days I just pray to the God of Sex and Drums and Rock 'N' Roll.
Some nights I lose the feeling,
Some nights I lose control,
Some nights I just lose it all when I watch you dance and the thunder rolls.
Maybe I'm lonely, And that's all I'm qualified to be,
There's just one and only, The one and only promise I can keep.
As long as the wheels are turning,
As long as the fires are burning,
As long as your prayers are coming true - You better believe it - !
That I would do anything for love!
As long as the fires are burning,
As long as your prayers are coming true - You better believe it - !
That I would do anything for love!
3.20 Diary
00:30 up to pee and snack...
04:45 up to pee and snack...
0745 kinda awake
0815 alarm off
0845 awake...
I was stretched out on the bed, prone, face down, wearing white boxer briefs, and She mumbling, "Oh that's tooooo inviting" and pulled out of the toy bag the bamboo cane, and said, "Be still.." and She whacked my bottom 25 times with it.... then She dropped the cane and picked up the zombie killer, and applied thirty with it...
Then She pulled down the briefs to take a look. "Ah, no blood...."
Then I got up for snack and pills and more cleaning....
Then showered and dressed ...
And in my car 1039, heading for text-study class....arriving in time to get a trenti iced-coffee, and get inside as it started.
Out of class at 13:00, I went back to my car, sat in it, had my one cigarette of the day, and called Her, to see if anything was needed.... just milk and cookies.
I went inside the supermarket, did some shopping, and headed home.
I arrived, went in, said hello to Her and Mb, and went into my bedroom to begin my next project.
We had earlier in the morning picked up all the little carpet and rugs spread over the concrete floor, and taken them out to wash them....now I was ready to begin, sweeping and mopping the entire floor.
And I emptied the porta-toilet and washed and dried all the mats,
and read from the text book for awhile...
Then figuring the floors were dry from the wet-mopping, I put my room back together....
Then She and I were in my car, 1750, and we headed to HB for a Munch.
We arrived around 1835.
...had Mexican dinner, while listening to a Female Dom talk about communications....
and left around 2115.
We went, a couple miles away, to the house Her son lived in, with Half-sister, and I sat in the car dozing, while She went inside.
She returned to the car, and we headed home.
Home and after some puttering around...
Asleep, 2300.
HsLO 396 1/2
HsLS 149 1/2
HsLD 15
D un 86
Times with That Dirty Slut 1
Days under public punishment 27
Lyric of the day:
Gazing at people, some hand in hand,
Just what I'm going through they can't understand.
Some try to tell me, thoughts they cannot defend,
Just what you want to be, you will be in the end.
04:45 up to pee and snack...
0745 kinda awake
0815 alarm off
0845 awake...
I was stretched out on the bed, prone, face down, wearing white boxer briefs, and She mumbling, "Oh that's tooooo inviting" and pulled out of the toy bag the bamboo cane, and said, "Be still.." and She whacked my bottom 25 times with it.... then She dropped the cane and picked up the zombie killer, and applied thirty with it...
Then She pulled down the briefs to take a look. "Ah, no blood...."
Then I got up for snack and pills and more cleaning....
Then showered and dressed ...
And in my car 1039, heading for text-study class....arriving in time to get a trenti iced-coffee, and get inside as it started.
Out of class at 13:00, I went back to my car, sat in it, had my one cigarette of the day, and called Her, to see if anything was needed.... just milk and cookies.
I went inside the supermarket, did some shopping, and headed home.
I arrived, went in, said hello to Her and Mb, and went into my bedroom to begin my next project.
We had earlier in the morning picked up all the little carpet and rugs spread over the concrete floor, and taken them out to wash them....now I was ready to begin, sweeping and mopping the entire floor.
And I emptied the porta-toilet and washed and dried all the mats,
and read from the text book for awhile...
Then figuring the floors were dry from the wet-mopping, I put my room back together....
Then She and I were in my car, 1750, and we headed to HB for a Munch.
We arrived around 1835.
...had Mexican dinner, while listening to a Female Dom talk about communications....
and left around 2115.
We went, a couple miles away, to the house Her son lived in, with Half-sister, and I sat in the car dozing, while She went inside.
She returned to the car, and we headed home.
Home and after some puttering around...
Asleep, 2300.
HsLO 396 1/2
HsLS 149 1/2
HsLD 15
D un 86
Times with That Dirty Slut 1
Days under public punishment 27
Lyric of the day:
Gazing at people, some hand in hand,
Just what I'm going through they can't understand.
Some try to tell me, thoughts they cannot defend,
Just what you want to be, you will be in the end.
And I love you, yes I love you,
Oh how I love you, oh how I love you.
Oh how I love you, oh how I love you.
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
03.18 Diary
Took off work at 0610, because I was coming back in so early...
Used a new mapping App on my phone called Waze...
It predicted I would be home at 0640.
I was home at 0642.
I feed the four-legged denizens of the house, and undressed, and changed to underwear and socks and robe, and went into Her room and woke Her up around 07:20, to tell Her, I wasn't going to shower, I was asked to be back at work at like 1800, and I planned to eat, and come to bed, and She mumbled, okay, and that She would try to go back to sleep.
At 0800, I went in to Her room, and She was awake, reading 'stuff' on Her phone.
I sat on the bed, and She said, "I need to talk to you."
I prepared to listen..and She said, "You woke me up ...when you came in...to tell me that you were't coming in to bed, until later. So, no reason for me to wake up, nothing to get up for, and I couldn't get back to sleep. You could have just waited until now, when you came in, and I could have stayed asleep."
"Yes, you're right, I'm sorry."
"Go get my bamboo cane."
............................................. !
I went and got it, and brought it back to Her, and She got out of bed, while saying, "Get undressed."
I did.
"Bend over the bed."
I did.
And I counted silently, as twenty five strokes of the cane landed across my buttocks.
"How many was that?'
"Twenty five."
"How many minutes early did you wake me?"
"Forty."
"Hmmm... count these out loud."
I counted out loud, another thirty strokes.
"Okay, I'm done."
I stood up, and hugged Her. "I'm sorry, I won't wake you up early, again."
"Good."
File the above under "Be careful what you wish for". I'm pretty sure... She ready my blog entry from yesterday. I'm pretty sure... She took this opportunity to accommodate my desire for punishment-type spankings, in this way, and that She wasn't 'really' punishing me "just" for waking Her up early. But, I'm not gonna ask Her. I'd prefer to go on thinking what I want to think, in regard to Her motivation.
Bed, around 0830.
Awake and up to pee, 1130, and again at 1330.
More awake at 1540, and didn't seem like any point in trying to go back to sleep for 20 minutes....so we talked a bit....
Then I got up, and showered, and dressed, etc....
And was in my car 1706.
The app 'Waze' predicted I would be at work at 1804.
And OMG the route it took me to get to work.... and it continued to micro adjust my eta, as I crawled along...and I arrived about 1830.
And ...it's been a wretched...busy...night.
Doing a multi car event for the cast of "Glee", celebrating the broadcast of their 100th episode...
Trying to get other work covered....
Helping the new person, with the set up for the next day which is much busier than today....
She and I did not have the final nails in the framework for next day's set up until 0145 or so.
And it got better...............
HsLO 348 1/2
HsLS 101 1/2
HsLD 15 1/2
D UN 84
Days under punishment 25
Daily lyric:
I want you, I need you, I got to be near you
I spent my money as I took my turn
I want you, I need you, I got to be near you
Ooh, I got a strange kind of woman
Daily quote:
Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! You know, I just... *do* things.
Used a new mapping App on my phone called Waze...
It predicted I would be home at 0640.
I was home at 0642.
I feed the four-legged denizens of the house, and undressed, and changed to underwear and socks and robe, and went into Her room and woke Her up around 07:20, to tell Her, I wasn't going to shower, I was asked to be back at work at like 1800, and I planned to eat, and come to bed, and She mumbled, okay, and that She would try to go back to sleep.
At 0800, I went in to Her room, and She was awake, reading 'stuff' on Her phone.
I sat on the bed, and She said, "I need to talk to you."
I prepared to listen..and She said, "You woke me up ...when you came in...to tell me that you were't coming in to bed, until later. So, no reason for me to wake up, nothing to get up for, and I couldn't get back to sleep. You could have just waited until now, when you came in, and I could have stayed asleep."
"Yes, you're right, I'm sorry."
"Go get my bamboo cane."
............................................. !
I went and got it, and brought it back to Her, and She got out of bed, while saying, "Get undressed."
I did.
"Bend over the bed."
I did.
And I counted silently, as twenty five strokes of the cane landed across my buttocks.
"How many was that?'
"Twenty five."
"How many minutes early did you wake me?"
"Forty."
"Hmmm... count these out loud."
I counted out loud, another thirty strokes.
"Okay, I'm done."
I stood up, and hugged Her. "I'm sorry, I won't wake you up early, again."
"Good."
File the above under "Be careful what you wish for". I'm pretty sure... She ready my blog entry from yesterday. I'm pretty sure... She took this opportunity to accommodate my desire for punishment-type spankings, in this way, and that She wasn't 'really' punishing me "just" for waking Her up early. But, I'm not gonna ask Her. I'd prefer to go on thinking what I want to think, in regard to Her motivation.
Bed, around 0830.
Awake and up to pee, 1130, and again at 1330.
More awake at 1540, and didn't seem like any point in trying to go back to sleep for 20 minutes....so we talked a bit....
Then I got up, and showered, and dressed, etc....
And was in my car 1706.
The app 'Waze' predicted I would be at work at 1804.
And OMG the route it took me to get to work.... and it continued to micro adjust my eta, as I crawled along...and I arrived about 1830.
And ...it's been a wretched...busy...night.
Doing a multi car event for the cast of "Glee", celebrating the broadcast of their 100th episode...
Trying to get other work covered....
Helping the new person, with the set up for the next day which is much busier than today....
She and I did not have the final nails in the framework for next day's set up until 0145 or so.
And it got better...............
HsLO 348 1/2
HsLS 101 1/2
HsLD 15 1/2
D UN 84
Days under punishment 25
Daily lyric:
I want you, I need you, I got to be near you
I spent my money as I took my turn
I want you, I need you, I got to be near you
Ooh, I got a strange kind of woman
Daily quote:
Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! You know, I just... *do* things.
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
03.17 diary
Off work 0630.
She arrived to pick me up about 0640, and we went home.
She told me about 'doing it' with Stitch, last night...AND earlier in the week, maybe Wednesday morning....and that She had not told me about it prior to this because She felt guilty.
Very strange (that She felt guilty.... She's been preaching about being polyamorous for years, right?)
Anyway, I was yawning so hard, I thought I'd pop a muscle.
We arrived home...and I feed the zoo, and undressed, and made some dinner..
and was in Her bed, asleep by 0830.
I woke up once, 1330 or so, with the sweet-tooth thing, and She was awake, and talking a mile a minute.
I wonder what She was talking about....
Back to sleep,
and up with my alarm, 1715.
Toilet, and shower, and dressed, and made coffee (iced..it's getting warm here!)...
And took pictures of ... "24 hours later"
In my car, and rolling 1815.
At work 1915.
Manager here, still training Other Person for next day set-up...
Otherwise, a nothing-special, even exceptionally slow, night.
My normal start time on Tuesday night is 19:00.
But we have an 'event' going on, Tuesday night. (91 rides right now, from 1400 on through the night).
So, Manager asked me to come in earlier, Tuesday night, and perhaps leave earlier Wednesday morning.
Well, if I can get enough sleep....
HsLO 324 1/2
HsLS 77 1/2
HsLD 31
D UN 83
Days under punishment/public 24
Lyric of the day
"Feel it coming
It's knocking at the door
You know it's no good running
No it's not against the law
The point of no return
Now how you know the score
And now you're learning
What's knockin' at your back door"
Quote of the day:
Coffee's out of the question. When I moved to California, I promised my mother that I wouldn't start doing drugs.
She arrived to pick me up about 0640, and we went home.
She told me about 'doing it' with Stitch, last night...AND earlier in the week, maybe Wednesday morning....and that She had not told me about it prior to this because She felt guilty.
Very strange (that She felt guilty.... She's been preaching about being polyamorous for years, right?)
Anyway, I was yawning so hard, I thought I'd pop a muscle.
We arrived home...and I feed the zoo, and undressed, and made some dinner..
and was in Her bed, asleep by 0830.
I woke up once, 1330 or so, with the sweet-tooth thing, and She was awake, and talking a mile a minute.
I wonder what She was talking about....
Back to sleep,
and up with my alarm, 1715.
Toilet, and shower, and dressed, and made coffee (iced..it's getting warm here!)...
And took pictures of ... "24 hours later"
In my car, and rolling 1815.
At work 1915.
Manager here, still training Other Person for next day set-up...
Otherwise, a nothing-special, even exceptionally slow, night.
My normal start time on Tuesday night is 19:00.
But we have an 'event' going on, Tuesday night. (91 rides right now, from 1400 on through the night).
So, Manager asked me to come in earlier, Tuesday night, and perhaps leave earlier Wednesday morning.
Well, if I can get enough sleep....
HsLO 324 1/2
HsLS 77 1/2
HsLD 31
D UN 83
Days under punishment/public 24
Lyric of the day
"Feel it coming
It's knocking at the door
You know it's no good running
No it's not against the law
The point of no return
Now how you know the score
And now you're learning
What's knockin' at your back door"
Quote of the day:
Coffee's out of the question. When I moved to California, I promised my mother that I wouldn't start doing drugs.
03.18 Reflections...
Just some things I've been thinkin' about, that don't fit into my regular diary/journal:
I'm sitting here with bruises on my sit spot and the front of my thighs
from a party on Sunday.... so the above pictures were selfies, 24 hours later.
They don't hurt...I'm not complainin'.
Just thinkin' about the conversation we had, oh, last Wednesday, wherein She stated, "We need to get back to basics, daily spankings, even twice a day.... you seemed happier when we did that...."
Well, we skipped Wednesday AND Thursday; had a 200-paddle-smack session on Friday, skipped Saturday, had a 200+ paddle-smack session at a party on Sunday, skipped Monday....
There were reasons for the skipped days....even though a session never has to be a LONG one...could be five or ten minutes....
But, what I'm really thinking is.... if we do get back into daily or twice-a-days, what is my butt going to look like?
I can only hope, if that's the right word, that every session is not as intense as recent ones have been.
Most/all recent sessions have been either with me on the spanking bench, or FDAU on Her bed.
Yet, I still long for the intimacy...the submission...of going over Her lap, as She sits in a chair.
For me, nothing matches this.
There's just something about being naked...and over Her lap.... butt up, and head down... so totally submissive, so classic...
I've also been thinking about... spontaneity versus planned.
Most of my Funishments are planned, to some extent, or at least to the extent, I know it's coming.
Right now, I can think of two instances where it wasn't planned, it was spontaneous, and it wasn't meant as 'funishment'.
One time,we were preparing for an out-of-town trip, and I was bad-mouthing Stitch in some way.... we were in my bedroom and She told me to drop my pants and bend over the bed.
And She got out Her cane and gave me, I don't remember how many, whacks... 6 or 8.
She told me to pull up my pants, and we resumed packing.
The other time... we were again packing for a trip, and She told me to get a blanket...and I did... then She came along with a different one.... and I started grumbling, a lot, about ...what's the point of asking me anyway, if She's going to make some other choice....
And She told me to get in the bedroom, drop my pants and bend over Her bed.
Then She fetched a paddle...
And gave my bottom...again, I don't remember... six or eight whacks .
And told me to pull my pants up, and we resuming packing.
I remember, being pissed off about it, each time.
It's taken me awhile to get my head around the idea that :
This is what WE DO. This is what I 'signed up for'.
Not just 'funishments' but also Discipline, whenever She deems it fitting.
And, as I look back at those times, I kinda think...
Those were BETTER than many Funishments.
Those were spontaneous. I did not see 'em coming.
They were given for real reason, not just "cuz She says so".
They were disciplinary.
(I really enjoy the funishments, but there is always a sexual aspect to it... the inkling that it is foreplay, that it is turning us on.... maybe leading to some bed-bouncing.
(But... when it's discipline, there is no sexual aspect to it, and I have a craving for discipline without sexual overtones, as seen in my "Mommy spanks" blog. )
However, they were short, really short, in duration.
Oh well.
I'm sitting here with bruises on my sit spot and the front of my thighs
from a party on Sunday.... so the above pictures were selfies, 24 hours later.
They don't hurt...I'm not complainin'.
Just thinkin' about the conversation we had, oh, last Wednesday, wherein She stated, "We need to get back to basics, daily spankings, even twice a day.... you seemed happier when we did that...."
Well, we skipped Wednesday AND Thursday; had a 200-paddle-smack session on Friday, skipped Saturday, had a 200+ paddle-smack session at a party on Sunday, skipped Monday....
There were reasons for the skipped days....even though a session never has to be a LONG one...could be five or ten minutes....
But, what I'm really thinking is.... if we do get back into daily or twice-a-days, what is my butt going to look like?
I can only hope, if that's the right word, that every session is not as intense as recent ones have been.
Most/all recent sessions have been either with me on the spanking bench, or FDAU on Her bed.
Yet, I still long for the intimacy...the submission...of going over Her lap, as She sits in a chair.
For me, nothing matches this.
There's just something about being naked...and over Her lap.... butt up, and head down... so totally submissive, so classic...
I've also been thinking about... spontaneity versus planned.
Most of my Funishments are planned, to some extent, or at least to the extent, I know it's coming.
Right now, I can think of two instances where it wasn't planned, it was spontaneous, and it wasn't meant as 'funishment'.
One time,we were preparing for an out-of-town trip, and I was bad-mouthing Stitch in some way.... we were in my bedroom and She told me to drop my pants and bend over the bed.
She told me to pull up my pants, and we resumed packing.
The other time... we were again packing for a trip, and She told me to get a blanket...and I did... then She came along with a different one.... and I started grumbling, a lot, about ...what's the point of asking me anyway, if She's going to make some other choice....
And She told me to get in the bedroom, drop my pants and bend over Her bed.
Then She fetched a paddle...
And gave my bottom...again, I don't remember... six or eight whacks .
And told me to pull my pants up, and we resuming packing.
I remember, being pissed off about it, each time.
It's taken me awhile to get my head around the idea that :
This is what WE DO. This is what I 'signed up for'.
Not just 'funishments' but also Discipline, whenever She deems it fitting.
And, as I look back at those times, I kinda think...
Those were BETTER than many Funishments.
Those were spontaneous. I did not see 'em coming.
They were given for real reason, not just "cuz She says so".
They were disciplinary.
(I really enjoy the funishments, but there is always a sexual aspect to it... the inkling that it is foreplay, that it is turning us on.... maybe leading to some bed-bouncing.
(But... when it's discipline, there is no sexual aspect to it, and I have a craving for discipline without sexual overtones, as seen in my "Mommy spanks" blog. )
However, they were short, really short, in duration.
Oh well.
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