She woke me, around 0100.
There had been an accident of a biological function, and we had to strip the bed down.
We found something to sleep on, and under, and went back to sleep.
Awake ...0830... and I did the various this-and-thats characteristic of a morning at home...
And got in my car around 1050, heading for the Thursday textbook-study class in BK.
29.3 miles.... and I arrived at 11:31, and walked in, and didn't miss a thing, as DrH was in a meeting with the office manager.
They wrapped up, and the other class attendees and I entered his office.
We were in class until shortly after 1300... managed to get through, oh, 3 pages of the textbook...and generally agreed to take a hiatus, and return on April 24th, same time.
I went to my car, and read some email (on my phone) and caught up on a couple phone calls that required my attention, then I headed for a gas station, then headed home.
I arrived around 1445, and She was gone with Her son, who had spent the night with us, since he had these appointments on these back to back days.
I went to my room, and started catching up on email.
She returned home around 1630, just to fill me in on what was going on for the rest of the evening, that She was going to pick up Mb, take D to get something fast to eat, take Mb to a restaurant, go to their meeting in SB... then come back to get me, then go drop Mb off, then return home....
She departed, and I began a project of rearranging my room...and drawers... so that all my notebooks were in one place, all my papers were in one place, as were my wallets, my calculators, my files, etc.
That took... awhile...
Then I had dinner (Chili, left over from one previous night, rice left over from another previous night) while reading TSOM.
About then, I felt a migraine coming on.
Back in my room, and I watched the most recent, and finale, I think, of Comic Book Men, along with another episode of Archer.
She called me and told me, that She dropped Mb by Herself, therefore was not coming to get me to be Her co pilot, and that I should 'watch out' and if it takes longer than 20 minutes for Her to get home, I should come looking for Her...
It did NOT take longer than 20 minutes, but She did call me, to come out and meet Her in the driveway... as She was worried that She had been followed.
We went back in the house without incident.
She went to Her room to do some online stuff.
I went to my room, and managed to go to sleep around 2230.
HsLS 34
HsLO 78 1/2
HsLB 107 1/2
D UN 100
DsLC 9 2/3
SMT for the day:
There is one Life. That Life is God. That Life is My Life now. Every organ action and function of my physical body is in harmony with the Divine Life. There is perfection assimilation, perfect circulation, and perfect elimination.
from My Manifest
I do NOT have 'permission' to whine or complain.
Friday, April 4, 2014
04.02 diary
around 0200, She text: "Just woke up..."
"Just now.."
"Well, a couple hours ago..."
We met in the s-o chat room, and started talking about financial strains, until others started popping into the room, and were listening.
She signed off, and went back to bed.
Work continued for me, until about 0930, and off I went.
Home, about 1045... in a really bad/angry mood.
(See the comment She left on my blog of 4.01, especially the last two sentences...... I felt like I was carrying a volcano in the pit of my stomach, that was ready to erupt..)
She came out of Her room as I came inside, saw the look on my face, and said, "I'll... leave you alone for awhile."
Fed my cats, updated notebooks, added litter to my cats' box,
She said, "After you've eaten, please come into my room to talk...)
I ate a bit of something while reading the paper....
And went into Her room.
She was .. duh...sitting at the chair in front of Her computer.
She said, "So..what's wrong?"
I took a breath or two or three...
And told Her, Her comment on my blog ...had me furious..
She wrote that She "...could spank you no matter how you feel..."
When in fact, there is NFW She could force it on me, if I was simply in no mo
od to take it.
And She wrote, "...perhaps I am too considerate of your feelings..."
Well, WTF? How is it possible to be 'too' considerate?
We talked it out, back and forth, and it had tears streaming down Her face at one point, but we talked it out...and She came away from Her chair, to join me on the bed where I sat.... then we reclined....
and... intercourse happened.
After a whole minute of cuddling, I headed off to my room for a nap, and She started getting ready to go, pick up Her son, living in HB, and take him to an appointment in SA.
She departed, and I fell asleep.
I was woken around 645, told to get up and showered/dressed, as we were going out to dinner, and I did so, and the four of us went off to the HTB.
We returned home.
She excused Herself to go do some 'computer stuff' in Her/Stitch's room, and I went to my room, to watch last night's "Justified".
Then I was asleep around 2245, and I'm told, by Her, that She came in and joined me, around midnight.
HsLS 10
HsLO 54 1.2
HsLB 59 1/2
Days UN 98
DsLC 8 2/3
SMT for the day:
"There is no weariness. Mind and Spirit do not become tired nor weary. I am Mind and Spirit. The flesh cannot weary, since it has no mind of its own. I am free from all illusions of weariness. My whole being responds to the thought of life. I am alive with the Great Vitality of the Spirit.
from My Manifesto:
I will do my best to answer any questions put to me honestly and directly, and will strive to make it my practice to volunteer any information that She should know about my physical or emotional condition.
"Just now.."
"Well, a couple hours ago..."
We met in the s-o chat room, and started talking about financial strains, until others started popping into the room, and were listening.
She signed off, and went back to bed.
Work continued for me, until about 0930, and off I went.
Home, about 1045... in a really bad/angry mood.
(See the comment She left on my blog of 4.01, especially the last two sentences...... I felt like I was carrying a volcano in the pit of my stomach, that was ready to erupt..)
She came out of Her room as I came inside, saw the look on my face, and said, "I'll... leave you alone for awhile."
Fed my cats, updated notebooks, added litter to my cats' box,
She said, "After you've eaten, please come into my room to talk...)
I ate a bit of something while reading the paper....
And went into Her room.
She was .. duh...sitting at the chair in front of Her computer.
She said, "So..what's wrong?"
I took a breath or two or three...
And told Her, Her comment on my blog ...had me furious..
She wrote that She "...could spank you no matter how you feel..."
When in fact, there is NFW She could force it on me, if I was simply in no mo
od to take it.
And She wrote, "...perhaps I am too considerate of your feelings..."
Well, WTF? How is it possible to be 'too' considerate?
We talked it out, back and forth, and it had tears streaming down Her face at one point, but we talked it out...and She came away from Her chair, to join me on the bed where I sat.... then we reclined....
and... intercourse happened.
After a whole minute of cuddling, I headed off to my room for a nap, and She started getting ready to go, pick up Her son, living in HB, and take him to an appointment in SA.
She departed, and I fell asleep.
I was woken around 645, told to get up and showered/dressed, as we were going out to dinner, and I did so, and the four of us went off to the HTB.
We returned home.
She excused Herself to go do some 'computer stuff' in Her/Stitch's room, and I went to my room, to watch last night's "Justified".
Then I was asleep around 2245, and I'm told, by Her, that She came in and joined me, around midnight.
HsLS 10
HsLO 54 1.2
HsLB 59 1/2
Days UN 98
DsLC 8 2/3
SMT for the day:
"There is no weariness. Mind and Spirit do not become tired nor weary. I am Mind and Spirit. The flesh cannot weary, since it has no mind of its own. I am free from all illusions of weariness. My whole being responds to the thought of life. I am alive with the Great Vitality of the Spirit.
from My Manifesto:
I will do my best to answer any questions put to me honestly and directly, and will strive to make it my practice to volunteer any information that She should know about my physical or emotional condition.
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
04,01 Diary
Off work...in car 0645, and home 0730.
I fed the animals, scooped a box, undressed, leaned back on my bed...and dozed off for a few minutes.
I woke up, like "huh what" but it had only been ... 15, 20 minutes. I bypassed taking a shower, and bypassed picking out any implements, and went to Her room.
And I told Her..."I'm really tired, my stomach is flip flopping... I should eat and go to bed."
She asked me to climb in, and I did, and we cuddled and chatted a bit, then She told me to "GET OUT" and I got up... went to the kitchen, heated up some leftover pizza that I brought home from the office, ate while reading the paper, and was in my room, in bed 0945.
I was woken up by Her around 1300, handing me the phone because Some Insurance Company wanted to talk to me about my bump n bash on Saturday night. And She was getting in the shower, getting ready to leave for an appointment.
And I got up and had my mid day snack..and went back to sleep.
Woke up 1700.
She came in, and talked a few minutes, then : "Do you want a spanking?"
I do not care how I feel... crappy or great, tired or wide awake....
I simply do not 'feel' right, answering that question with a "yes."
I realize, She wants to take into account the way I am feeling, overall physically.
But, I just don't want to say, "Yes, I want..."
Better, ask me "Should I give you...."
Or, "Are you ready for a ..."
Or some other turn of phrase that does not suggest my desire for it.
"Um, no."
"Okay, get up and get ready for work, then. I'm going to take a nap."
She left my room.
I got up....went to the bathroom and OF COURSE it was occupied.
That has been happening to me one hell of a lot, lately.
After a few minutes, it was my turn.
I showered.... dressed...went to Her room, and kissed Her goodbye, half waking Her up.
In my car, 1806, and at work right about 1900.
Still ..working with the new woman who is doing set up on Monday and Tuesday night... so it keeps me kinda busy.
I did not hear from Her again until ..................................
HsLO 182\
HsLS 30 1/2
HsLD 59 1/2
D un 98
D sL CIG 7 2/3
Quote for the Day
I have faith. I am faith ..I abide in faith. All doubt and fear have left me. I understand why it is that I can remain in faith. I have complete confidence. I do not waver nor falter in my faith, for I know that God the Living Spirit is the only Presence there is or ever can be.
From My Manifesto:
Whenever She and I are together, whether in public or in private, I am in service to Her.
I fed the animals, scooped a box, undressed, leaned back on my bed...and dozed off for a few minutes.
I woke up, like "huh what" but it had only been ... 15, 20 minutes. I bypassed taking a shower, and bypassed picking out any implements, and went to Her room.
And I told Her..."I'm really tired, my stomach is flip flopping... I should eat and go to bed."
She asked me to climb in, and I did, and we cuddled and chatted a bit, then She told me to "GET OUT" and I got up... went to the kitchen, heated up some leftover pizza that I brought home from the office, ate while reading the paper, and was in my room, in bed 0945.
I was woken up by Her around 1300, handing me the phone because Some Insurance Company wanted to talk to me about my bump n bash on Saturday night. And She was getting in the shower, getting ready to leave for an appointment.
And I got up and had my mid day snack..and went back to sleep.
Woke up 1700.
She came in, and talked a few minutes, then : "Do you want a spanking?"
I do not care how I feel... crappy or great, tired or wide awake....
I simply do not 'feel' right, answering that question with a "yes."
I realize, She wants to take into account the way I am feeling, overall physically.
But, I just don't want to say, "Yes, I want..."
Better, ask me "Should I give you...."
Or, "Are you ready for a ..."
Or some other turn of phrase that does not suggest my desire for it.
"Um, no."
"Okay, get up and get ready for work, then. I'm going to take a nap."
She left my room.
I got up....went to the bathroom and OF COURSE it was occupied.
That has been happening to me one hell of a lot, lately.
After a few minutes, it was my turn.
I showered.... dressed...went to Her room, and kissed Her goodbye, half waking Her up.
In my car, 1806, and at work right about 1900.
Still ..working with the new woman who is doing set up on Monday and Tuesday night... so it keeps me kinda busy.
I did not hear from Her again until ..................................
HsLO 182\
HsLS 30 1/2
HsLD 59 1/2
D un 98
D sL CIG 7 2/3
Quote for the Day
I have faith. I am faith ..I abide in faith. All doubt and fear have left me. I understand why it is that I can remain in faith. I have complete confidence. I do not waver nor falter in my faith, for I know that God the Living Spirit is the only Presence there is or ever can be.
From My Manifesto:
Whenever She and I are together, whether in public or in private, I am in service to Her.
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
03.31 (not 04.01) Diary
off work 0635...home 0730...
Feed the animals.... scoop the book, undressed, took a short shower, ate some dinner..
And went into Her bedroom, and joined Her in bed.
Then moved to my bed, around 0900....
Up 1400 to pee and snack...
Kind of awake, 1530, off and on....
Really awake, 1715, and we talked awhile, ending with me giving Her oral service for a bit.
Then upright..... toilet... shower, dressed, back to toilet... and ready to go.
In leaving and saying goodbye, She said, "Bring two implements in the morning...."
In car, 1838, light traffic other than a few miles on the 101.... at work 1925 or so....and ...on the toilet.
Five minutes or so after I'm 'in the seat', I had a driver..... whose plane with the client he was picking up was on the ground...tell me, "I'm cancelling this ride, I can't make it..."
Well what the fuck.
There's more to it, but that sums it up.
I scrambled, got that one covered with another driver in the holding lot who was waiting on one, and then I had to cover HER ride with another driver, and etc.
Once the dust settled on that, I got to hear about the bomb scare for which they had to evacuate our whole building, from 1330 to 1600 or so.
Around midnight, She and I started chatting in a room, mostly about financial problems... until we were joined by another guy, who I've known for almost a year, now lives within a few miles of us, but continues to duck me when I ask to meet for coffee.
HsLO 158
HsLS 6 1/2
HsLD 35 1/2
D un 97
Since last cigarette: 6 days, 17 hrs
Quote for the day:
"If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it.
If you don't ask, the answer is always no.
If you don't step forward, you are always in the same place."
From My Manifest:
I understand and accept that She is Polyamorous, that She currently has another partner besides me, that She may choose to take on other or additional partners in the future.
Feed the animals.... scoop the book, undressed, took a short shower, ate some dinner..
And went into Her bedroom, and joined Her in bed.
Then moved to my bed, around 0900....
Up 1400 to pee and snack...
Kind of awake, 1530, off and on....
Really awake, 1715, and we talked awhile, ending with me giving Her oral service for a bit.
Then upright..... toilet... shower, dressed, back to toilet... and ready to go.
In leaving and saying goodbye, She said, "Bring two implements in the morning...."
In car, 1838, light traffic other than a few miles on the 101.... at work 1925 or so....and ...on the toilet.
Five minutes or so after I'm 'in the seat', I had a driver..... whose plane with the client he was picking up was on the ground...tell me, "I'm cancelling this ride, I can't make it..."
Well what the fuck.
There's more to it, but that sums it up.
I scrambled, got that one covered with another driver in the holding lot who was waiting on one, and then I had to cover HER ride with another driver, and etc.
Once the dust settled on that, I got to hear about the bomb scare for which they had to evacuate our whole building, from 1330 to 1600 or so.
Around midnight, She and I started chatting in a room, mostly about financial problems... until we were joined by another guy, who I've known for almost a year, now lives within a few miles of us, but continues to duck me when I ask to meet for coffee.
HsLO 158
HsLS 6 1/2
HsLD 35 1/2
D un 97
Since last cigarette: 6 days, 17 hrs
Quote for the day:
"If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it.
If you don't ask, the answer is always no.
If you don't step forward, you are always in the same place."
From My Manifest:
I understand and accept that She is Polyamorous, that She currently has another partner besides me, that She may choose to take on other or additional partners in the future.
Monday, March 31, 2014
03.30 Diary
As I sat in my car, the owner of the car in front of me, along with like 5 other people, came out...and started talking about ...the damage to the rear end of his car.... and after ten minutes, one noticed that I was sitting there in my car.
He approached me, and ..I gave him my insurance information.
Then I sat quietly awhile, then drove off to the 7-11 for a cup of cappuccino, and returned.
After a few minutes, Stitch came out again.... and said, 'She says, if you're not coming in, then we're both coming out."
"I'm not coming in," I said.
He went back in, and returned with Her.
They got in the car, and I drove...to the restaurant where they, long before me, and now 'we', habitually go for after-dinner ice cream.
The waiter that's been on this shift..forever... met us at the door.... just to tell us, the restaurant was out of ice cream!
No matter, we went in..... we all had coffee, She had apple cobbler, Stitch had banana cream pie....
Stitch went to pay... She came up behind me, bent down, and ...bit my neck.
Unprepared and so not in the mood, I yelled, "G....DAMMIT!"
And...we headed home, in quiet..arriving 0215..and in bed 0230.
She was up earlier...and asked if I wanted pancakes or crepes.
"No thank you... " I mumbled.
While I dozed, She came in, and took my laundry hamper out to the wash area.
I got up, around noon...
Had coffee, and a snack, while reading the newpaper....
Went to use the toilet, and just like it happened repeatedly over these days off, Stitch was occupying the bathroom.
I finally got my turn.
Shortly thereafter, I was prepping to take a shower, prior to work...and our other roommate was in the shower ahead of me. siiiiiiiigh.
And I realized, and started chuckling, it was only 1245 or so.... and I didn't need to leave until 1345 or so.... I was about an hour off in my head.
I was in Her room, talking about that, and She said, "Go get the zombie killer..."
I looked at Her in disbelief for a scant moment, then...went and got it.
I returned, and She told me to bend over the bed...which Stitch was still laying on, while reading email or I don't know what, on his cell phone.
To the seat of my grey boxer briefs, She applied 50+ strokes of the zombie killer.
She pulled down the briefs....
And started shrieking, "These are dirty, your ass is dirty! Take these off! Clean your ass! Put on clean shorts!"
I went to the bathroom, with a deep feeling of "fuck this, I don't need this ..."
My ass was NOT dirty.... what She saw in my briefs was from a prior movement....
I went on to my room, and thought about laying down until it was time to go.
She came into my room, and we talked about it briefly.
She left.... and for a reason that escapes me, I started going through my underwear drawers, folding most of my pairs of briefs and tights, somewhat neatly.
THEN I went and showered...and dressed...and packed ...and mixed up some iced coffee.... while little-s, who had emerged, reminded me twice to 'get gas' as she had seen the low-fuel indicator light up, the night before....
And in my car 1400, and stopped at the closest gas station.
On to work.... traffic on the 10 being thicker than I was used to on that route, then traffic on the 101 was ... jammed.... and so I arrived at work around 1505.
My job on the Sunday shift, is "set up" ..i.e. setting up the next day's work... which I used to do, daily, until I went on the overnight shift. It's a different challenge, and ..sometimes...kinda fun, as it's like putting together a puzzle, getting all the pieces together.
In the course of the night, we exchanged texts:
"Your clothes are ready what would you like me to do with them?"
"Put em back in my laundry basket, after removing anything in there currently and putting in white basket"
"Okay now I'm lost. I interrupted C's laundry to do yours. Now she is doing her laundry. Please re explain your instructions in a way that I may understand it"
SERIOUSLY?
I have two laundry baskets in my room...one large/tan, one small/white. If anything is in the tan one right now, it's dirty...so put it in the white basket, and use the tan one for all the clean laundry coming out of the dryer. What is so fucking difficult?
I wrote back:
"Throw it in the swimming pool"
She wrote
"Will b
"Do so now"
I have no idea how this is going to play out.
I am pretty sure She is way too practical to actually have thrown it in the swimming pool.
But if I arrive home, and see that She really did....
Oh, forget it, I don't want to play the game of "what if".
Later, another text from Her:
"Recorded BBT for you. The spanking episode"
I didn't really care for that episode, even if it did include spanking, and I told Her so:
"Didn't really like it, but thanks."
"Then I will delete it."
The most fitting comment there would have been "whatever..." but I really dislike when OTHER people say that, so I did not say that, or anything else.
And in a few minutes from Her:
"I'm starting to feel like I can't do anything right today"
Well, it was 10:00 at night when She wrote that, and I replied:
"The day is nearly over"
And, 45 minutes after that:
"Did you register for the lick party on Friday? Please let me know ASAP"
Well, the main problem with registering is, one has to do it by RSVPing to an actual invitation, and I have not received one (yet).
The second problem is the one I replied to Her about:
"I did not, and doubtful about going, considering $50."
The price of admission to this party is $15 for F, $35 for M.
Her reply :
"ERGH"
I am curious why She needed my reply "ASAP" but I suppose the answer to that will ... or will not... come out in good time.
Additionally...and something I have yet to discuss with Her ... is....
After my PA the previous night, I am seriously...very seriously.... thinking about taking a hiatus from public play.
I don't mean, swearing it off altogether, just taking a hiatus...while trying to get a feeling for how much I really do or do not 'miss it'.
I'm thinking, all of April....and then She'll be out of town, May 2 to May 9.
So, maybe.... through, and until, She returns.
I don't mean, not going at all, not attending the parties.
Just NOT playing, NOT being turned into an exhibition, NOT walking around with a ring of jingle-bells around my junk just because it amuses Her,
...Just being a spectator, if She wants me to accompany Her to any parties She might want to attend.
HsLO 134
HsLS 35
Her DO? No
HsLD 11 1/2
D UN 96
Thought for the Day
"There are no delays in the Divine Plan for me.
Nothing can hinder the operation of this Law unto my Life and Action.
Obstructions are removed from my path and I now enter into the realization and manifestation of complete fulfillment,
I do not have to wait, for the Law waits upon me at every turn in Life's road."
from My Manifesto:
I will never engage in masturbation of my own accord, but only with express consent and permission from Her.
He approached me, and ..I gave him my insurance information.
Then I sat quietly awhile, then drove off to the 7-11 for a cup of cappuccino, and returned.
After a few minutes, Stitch came out again.... and said, 'She says, if you're not coming in, then we're both coming out."
"I'm not coming in," I said.
He went back in, and returned with Her.
They got in the car, and I drove...to the restaurant where they, long before me, and now 'we', habitually go for after-dinner ice cream.
The waiter that's been on this shift..forever... met us at the door.... just to tell us, the restaurant was out of ice cream!
No matter, we went in..... we all had coffee, She had apple cobbler, Stitch had banana cream pie....
Stitch went to pay... She came up behind me, bent down, and ...bit my neck.
Unprepared and so not in the mood, I yelled, "G....DAMMIT!"
And...we headed home, in quiet..arriving 0215..and in bed 0230.
She was up earlier...and asked if I wanted pancakes or crepes.
"No thank you... " I mumbled.
While I dozed, She came in, and took my laundry hamper out to the wash area.
I got up, around noon...
Had coffee, and a snack, while reading the newpaper....
Went to use the toilet, and just like it happened repeatedly over these days off, Stitch was occupying the bathroom.
I finally got my turn.
Shortly thereafter, I was prepping to take a shower, prior to work...and our other roommate was in the shower ahead of me. siiiiiiiigh.
And I realized, and started chuckling, it was only 1245 or so.... and I didn't need to leave until 1345 or so.... I was about an hour off in my head.
I was in Her room, talking about that, and She said, "Go get the zombie killer..."
I looked at Her in disbelief for a scant moment, then...went and got it.
I returned, and She told me to bend over the bed...which Stitch was still laying on, while reading email or I don't know what, on his cell phone.
To the seat of my grey boxer briefs, She applied 50+ strokes of the zombie killer.
She pulled down the briefs....
And started shrieking, "These are dirty, your ass is dirty! Take these off! Clean your ass! Put on clean shorts!"
I went to the bathroom, with a deep feeling of "fuck this, I don't need this ..."
My ass was NOT dirty.... what She saw in my briefs was from a prior movement....
I went on to my room, and thought about laying down until it was time to go.
She came into my room, and we talked about it briefly.
She left.... and for a reason that escapes me, I started going through my underwear drawers, folding most of my pairs of briefs and tights, somewhat neatly.
THEN I went and showered...and dressed...and packed ...and mixed up some iced coffee.... while little-s, who had emerged, reminded me twice to 'get gas' as she had seen the low-fuel indicator light up, the night before....
And in my car 1400, and stopped at the closest gas station.
On to work.... traffic on the 10 being thicker than I was used to on that route, then traffic on the 101 was ... jammed.... and so I arrived at work around 1505.
My job on the Sunday shift, is "set up" ..i.e. setting up the next day's work... which I used to do, daily, until I went on the overnight shift. It's a different challenge, and ..sometimes...kinda fun, as it's like putting together a puzzle, getting all the pieces together.
In the course of the night, we exchanged texts:
"Your clothes are ready what would you like me to do with them?"
"Put em back in my laundry basket, after removing anything in there currently and putting in white basket"
"Okay now I'm lost. I interrupted C's laundry to do yours. Now she is doing her laundry. Please re explain your instructions in a way that I may understand it"
SERIOUSLY?
I have two laundry baskets in my room...one large/tan, one small/white. If anything is in the tan one right now, it's dirty...so put it in the white basket, and use the tan one for all the clean laundry coming out of the dryer. What is so fucking difficult?
I wrote back:
"Throw it in the swimming pool"
She wrote
"Will b
"Do so now"
I have no idea how this is going to play out.
I am pretty sure She is way too practical to actually have thrown it in the swimming pool.
But if I arrive home, and see that She really did....
Oh, forget it, I don't want to play the game of "what if".
Later, another text from Her:
"Recorded BBT for you. The spanking episode"
I didn't really care for that episode, even if it did include spanking, and I told Her so:
"Didn't really like it, but thanks."
"Then I will delete it."
The most fitting comment there would have been "whatever..." but I really dislike when OTHER people say that, so I did not say that, or anything else.
And in a few minutes from Her:
"I'm starting to feel like I can't do anything right today"
Well, it was 10:00 at night when She wrote that, and I replied:
"The day is nearly over"
And, 45 minutes after that:
"Did you register for the lick party on Friday? Please let me know ASAP"
Well, the main problem with registering is, one has to do it by RSVPing to an actual invitation, and I have not received one (yet).
The second problem is the one I replied to Her about:
"I did not, and doubtful about going, considering $50."
The price of admission to this party is $15 for F, $35 for M.
Her reply :
"ERGH"
I am curious why She needed my reply "ASAP" but I suppose the answer to that will ... or will not... come out in good time.
Additionally...and something I have yet to discuss with Her ... is....
After my PA the previous night, I am seriously...very seriously.... thinking about taking a hiatus from public play.
I don't mean, swearing it off altogether, just taking a hiatus...while trying to get a feeling for how much I really do or do not 'miss it'.
I'm thinking, all of April....and then She'll be out of town, May 2 to May 9.
So, maybe.... through, and until, She returns.
I don't mean, not going at all, not attending the parties.
Just NOT playing, NOT being turned into an exhibition, NOT walking around with a ring of jingle-bells around my junk just because it amuses Her,
...Just being a spectator, if She wants me to accompany Her to any parties She might want to attend.
HsLO 134
HsLS 35
Her DO? No
HsLD 11 1/2
D UN 96
Thought for the Day
"There are no delays in the Divine Plan for me.
Nothing can hinder the operation of this Law unto my Life and Action.
Obstructions are removed from my path and I now enter into the realization and manifestation of complete fulfillment,
I do not have to wait, for the Law waits upon me at every turn in Life's road."
from My Manifesto:
I will never engage in masturbation of my own accord, but only with express consent and permission from Her.
Sunday, March 30, 2014
03.29 Diary
09:30 up...and pills and something to eat and coffee... then sitting around, then a shower and body shave.
The She gathered up Momma Kukla and her two young 'uns into a carrier, and we went off to a vet, to have them checked out.
We returned an hour or so later...
And She wanted to get Her Daily Orgasm, and I obliged Her.
And I asked, rather than me going on Her errands, including W's house, maybe the PO, maybe a Coal's, that She take Stitch as I had a number of household chores to do, and She agreed.
I started with weekly reading from The Science of Mind...
And listened to Her get into a yelling match with Stitch, having to do with Stitch throwing stuff away, from the top of Her desk, which he had no right to be throwing away.... and as a result of that, he did not go with Her, and She set off alone.
I continued... by bringing Her dry laundry in, and folding it up and putting it away... and putting Her second load in to wash (but I used the wrong detergent...)
I did more measurements ...the bathroom and garage...for the charts I've been making...
And felt another earthquake roll through, 4.5 I heard later...
I started to doze in my easy chair, and Stitch woke me up to say he "just found out" that he needs to get to an ATM for cash for Her son that was coming over, who needed it for automotive repair.
Funny thing, She called me about this, two hours prior, so how is it he "just found out"?
No matter, now, I got up, and we went to my car, and drove down to where His bank and mine sit, 1/4 of a block apart. His bank has a stand alone branch up along the main street, and has another branch inside the supermarket, some 200 yards offset from the street.
I pulled up to my bank, and told him, "I'll do my thing here, and you walk on down there, and I'll pick you up there."
"Okay..."
Getting out, I watched him heading down the side of the building, heading for the supermarket.
I yelled at him, and pointed at the main branch.
He walked back, walked around the front of whatever building it was, and started heading for the supermarket, and I ran after him, saying, "Go to the main branch over there PLEASE."
He finally got it, and went to the main branch.
I went to my ATM, got in my car, and went down and picked him up when he was done, and headed home.
I fixed the number sign on the outside of our house that continues to fall down and off.
I updated my calendar... got online and updated my bank account, pay some bills, looked at my budget, sending my stress level to a new high....
And went out to the garage to start counting comics.
I hope to sell them someday (soon) and I've given up on an actual inventory, but I want to at least 'count them' so I know how many I have, when I get around to advertising them for sale.
She came home....and asked me to come inside for a fashion show.
I did, and She called for Stitch to join us, who took his sweet time doing so, like he does whenever She asks him to , and it's getting really fucking annoying to me...
And She showed us the bras She bought....and black ruffle panties ...and a couple of dresses....
Then I returned to the garage, to count more comics.
Totally bored by it, I went back into the house.
She asked me about the laundry.... it was on the 2nd rinse.
She is hyper sensitive to laundry detergent on Her clothes, and always is thorough when washing to make sure the soap is rinsed out.
She started on dinner...
I went through a stack of mail order catalogs.
My little dog Cookie was outside, and apparently, had not gotten the hang of the doggie doors that I had cut into the lower half of the screen door, so we spent some time in the kitchen, with Cookie on the outside, trying to get her to get the hang of it.
Then dinner....they had chicken and rice and broccoli, I had a cup of chicken soup, and raw carrots and celery with dip. I try to eat light, before going to a party....
And ..waited for Her laundry in the washer, now on its 3rd or 4th rinse.
And we napped in our easy chairs.
She finally put the clothes She wanted right away in the dryer, and we started getting ready, with showers, and getting dressed, and me packing the toy bag.
She was ready, and when I had the last thing packed, everything but ear plugs..... I said, "Show time!"
She yelled, "You hear that, Stitch, it's show time!"
From the bedroom, came the words, "Yeah...so?"
Oh, I was pissed. He knew damn well what it meant. "IT'S TIME TO GO!"
She added with a yell, "You going or not, we're leaving!"
He came stumbling out, and we went to my car.
And off we went to the party at the BoD, arriving...
I'm honestly not sure. 10:30? 11..ish?
We arrived, I spotted a parking place directly across the street from the main driveway entrance.... which would take some careful parallel parking to get into.....
Which resulted in, me tapping the rear end of the car in front of me, several times.
I paid... five bucks a person, quite the bargain...we entered....
and OMG the noise and confusion....
Well, not confusion, really...everybody seemed like they knew what they were doing...but so many of them...
And music that is NOT music to my 57-year-old ears.
We stood for a minute, looking over the frolicking in the main room, and She said, 'I'm going outside, people I need to talk to."
Now, She did not say, "Stay here." or "Come with me." or "Want to come with me?"
She just went, without waiting for a response, and I stood there.
Listening to the LOUD noise that passed for music...... getting jostled by people walking by me where I stood.... feeling alone.... like I did, when I attended these things alone...
And 'it' came on, fast and hard.... total panic...I had to get out.
I tried to get my car keys out of the toy bag, getting jostled three times while I did so.
I walked outside, thought about going to the car, decided to find a place to sit ...in the driveway, under some light so She could see me, and plopped down in folded-leg position, and started meditating.
She found me...said She had been looking for me for fifteen minutes.... even called me (I looked at my phone, buried in my pants pocket, one missed call, one vcml ... from Her).
She knew what was up with me, She understood about my panic attacks.
It had been a while since my last one....
I told Her, I just wanted to go sit in the car, and get my peace back.
She said, okay, She would send Stitch out to check on me, in awhile.
I went to the car...
After 30 or 40 minutes, Stitch came out...I said, "I'm okay, but I'm not ready to come in."
He nodded, and went back in.....
HsLO 110
HsLS 11
Her DO? Yes
HsLD 37 1/2
D UN 95
Thought for the Day:
"I believe that the divine intelligence which is the Mind of God is guiding and directing my thoughts and acts. I believe that God already knows the answer to this particular probelm; therefore I let go of it and listen to the answer."
From My Manifesto:
I may be required to perform fellatio, on inanimate objects or living flesh.
The She gathered up Momma Kukla and her two young 'uns into a carrier, and we went off to a vet, to have them checked out.
We returned an hour or so later...
And She wanted to get Her Daily Orgasm, and I obliged Her.
And I asked, rather than me going on Her errands, including W's house, maybe the PO, maybe a Coal's, that She take Stitch as I had a number of household chores to do, and She agreed.
I started with weekly reading from The Science of Mind...
And listened to Her get into a yelling match with Stitch, having to do with Stitch throwing stuff away, from the top of Her desk, which he had no right to be throwing away.... and as a result of that, he did not go with Her, and She set off alone.
I continued... by bringing Her dry laundry in, and folding it up and putting it away... and putting Her second load in to wash (but I used the wrong detergent...)
I did more measurements ...the bathroom and garage...for the charts I've been making...
And felt another earthquake roll through, 4.5 I heard later...
I started to doze in my easy chair, and Stitch woke me up to say he "just found out" that he needs to get to an ATM for cash for Her son that was coming over, who needed it for automotive repair.
Funny thing, She called me about this, two hours prior, so how is it he "just found out"?
No matter, now, I got up, and we went to my car, and drove down to where His bank and mine sit, 1/4 of a block apart. His bank has a stand alone branch up along the main street, and has another branch inside the supermarket, some 200 yards offset from the street.
I pulled up to my bank, and told him, "I'll do my thing here, and you walk on down there, and I'll pick you up there."
"Okay..."
Getting out, I watched him heading down the side of the building, heading for the supermarket.
I yelled at him, and pointed at the main branch.
He walked back, walked around the front of whatever building it was, and started heading for the supermarket, and I ran after him, saying, "Go to the main branch over there PLEASE."
He finally got it, and went to the main branch.
I went to my ATM, got in my car, and went down and picked him up when he was done, and headed home.
I fixed the number sign on the outside of our house that continues to fall down and off.
I updated my calendar... got online and updated my bank account, pay some bills, looked at my budget, sending my stress level to a new high....
And went out to the garage to start counting comics.
I hope to sell them someday (soon) and I've given up on an actual inventory, but I want to at least 'count them' so I know how many I have, when I get around to advertising them for sale.
She came home....and asked me to come inside for a fashion show.
I did, and She called for Stitch to join us, who took his sweet time doing so, like he does whenever She asks him to , and it's getting really fucking annoying to me...
And She showed us the bras She bought....and black ruffle panties ...and a couple of dresses....
Then I returned to the garage, to count more comics.
Totally bored by it, I went back into the house.
She asked me about the laundry.... it was on the 2nd rinse.
She is hyper sensitive to laundry detergent on Her clothes, and always is thorough when washing to make sure the soap is rinsed out.
She started on dinner...
I went through a stack of mail order catalogs.
My little dog Cookie was outside, and apparently, had not gotten the hang of the doggie doors that I had cut into the lower half of the screen door, so we spent some time in the kitchen, with Cookie on the outside, trying to get her to get the hang of it.
Then dinner....they had chicken and rice and broccoli, I had a cup of chicken soup, and raw carrots and celery with dip. I try to eat light, before going to a party....
And ..waited for Her laundry in the washer, now on its 3rd or 4th rinse.
And we napped in our easy chairs.
She finally put the clothes She wanted right away in the dryer, and we started getting ready, with showers, and getting dressed, and me packing the toy bag.
She was ready, and when I had the last thing packed, everything but ear plugs..... I said, "Show time!"
She yelled, "You hear that, Stitch, it's show time!"
From the bedroom, came the words, "Yeah...so?"
Oh, I was pissed. He knew damn well what it meant. "IT'S TIME TO GO!"
She added with a yell, "You going or not, we're leaving!"
He came stumbling out, and we went to my car.
And off we went to the party at the BoD, arriving...
I'm honestly not sure. 10:30? 11..ish?
We arrived, I spotted a parking place directly across the street from the main driveway entrance.... which would take some careful parallel parking to get into.....
Which resulted in, me tapping the rear end of the car in front of me, several times.
I paid... five bucks a person, quite the bargain...we entered....
and OMG the noise and confusion....
Well, not confusion, really...everybody seemed like they knew what they were doing...but so many of them...
And music that is NOT music to my 57-year-old ears.
We stood for a minute, looking over the frolicking in the main room, and She said, 'I'm going outside, people I need to talk to."
Now, She did not say, "Stay here." or "Come with me." or "Want to come with me?"
She just went, without waiting for a response, and I stood there.
Listening to the LOUD noise that passed for music...... getting jostled by people walking by me where I stood.... feeling alone.... like I did, when I attended these things alone...
And 'it' came on, fast and hard.... total panic...I had to get out.
I tried to get my car keys out of the toy bag, getting jostled three times while I did so.
I walked outside, thought about going to the car, decided to find a place to sit ...in the driveway, under some light so She could see me, and plopped down in folded-leg position, and started meditating.
She found me...said She had been looking for me for fifteen minutes.... even called me (I looked at my phone, buried in my pants pocket, one missed call, one vcml ... from Her).
She knew what was up with me, She understood about my panic attacks.
It had been a while since my last one....
I told Her, I just wanted to go sit in the car, and get my peace back.
She said, okay, She would send Stitch out to check on me, in awhile.
I went to the car...
After 30 or 40 minutes, Stitch came out...I said, "I'm okay, but I'm not ready to come in."
He nodded, and went back in.....
HsLO 110
HsLS 11
Her DO? Yes
HsLD 37 1/2
D UN 95
Thought for the Day:
"I believe that the divine intelligence which is the Mind of God is guiding and directing my thoughts and acts. I believe that God already knows the answer to this particular probelm; therefore I let go of it and listen to the answer."
From My Manifesto:
I may be required to perform fellatio, on inanimate objects or living flesh.
Diary 3.28
We watched "Episodes" and one TBBT...
and... had sex.
And went to sleep... 0230.
Up around 0900.
She brought me coffee...and I got up and fed my cats, as She already fed the dogs....
Then while She sat on the bed, I lay face down prone next to Her...provocatively...
And She picked up the bath brush, and applied forty of it to the seat of my briefs... then told me to count 'em, while She added another twenty from the Zombie Killer.
And ...we had sex.
After putting very wet bedcovers in the washing machine, we showered together, and dressed, and got in my car, and I drove.... to Tor, for Her waxing appointment, as I took notes, while She started thinking about an 'ad' that She wants to post online.
Then we went next door to the Japanese dollar-fifty store... then down to a Right-Ad for an ice cream cone for Her, then off to a Koal's looking for some shoes that we heard were on sale.
The shoes were there, but not in Her size... we left, and went to the supermarket for weekly shopping.
We arrived home, and She hurried inside, as Nature was not just calling, but screaming at Her.
I brought in the packages, and unpacked them.
She went to the other bedroom to take a nap.
I cut up an apple, went to my room, changed wallets, to one I just bought...
She came in, and we both napped, from 1800 to 1930.
I woke up, and started doing...
As in, online, checking on pix.
I woke Her up, asking about dinner, and She jumped up, and went to fixing.
I started watching "Archer" while writing my blogs.
She called dinner ready.
The three of us sat at the table for ...oh... ten minutes... eating chili and corn bread, then we went our separate ways, Stitch to his room to watch tv, Her to her computer, in Stitch's room, and me to my room.
I watched more 'Archer" ....
and felt an earthquake rumble through at 2115, about a 5.1, I heard later.
And more "Archer" and I was falling asleep, on a bed with no sheets.
I started watching "King of Queen" reruns, with eyes barely open.
She came in with all the bedcovers, and rather crabbily I readily admit, I helped Her getting them on the bed.
All done...and in bed, sleeping around midnight.
HsLO 86
HsLS 13
Her DO? Yes (twice!)
HsLD 13 1/2
D UN 94
Pictures from 3/27
Lyric for the Day:
You've done me no right
But you've done me some wrong
Left me lonely each night
While I sing my sad song
Quote for the Day:
"What are you thinking, maybe a big musical number?"
from My Manifesto:
I may be required to receive anal penetration, in varying shapes and forms, none of which is intended to inflict permanent harm or injury.
and... had sex.
And went to sleep... 0230.
Up around 0900.
She brought me coffee...and I got up and fed my cats, as She already fed the dogs....
Then while She sat on the bed, I lay face down prone next to Her...provocatively...
And She picked up the bath brush, and applied forty of it to the seat of my briefs... then told me to count 'em, while She added another twenty from the Zombie Killer.
And ...we had sex.
After putting very wet bedcovers in the washing machine, we showered together, and dressed, and got in my car, and I drove.... to Tor, for Her waxing appointment, as I took notes, while She started thinking about an 'ad' that She wants to post online.
Then we went next door to the Japanese dollar-fifty store... then down to a Right-Ad for an ice cream cone for Her, then off to a Koal's looking for some shoes that we heard were on sale.
The shoes were there, but not in Her size... we left, and went to the supermarket for weekly shopping.
We arrived home, and She hurried inside, as Nature was not just calling, but screaming at Her.
I brought in the packages, and unpacked them.
She went to the other bedroom to take a nap.
I cut up an apple, went to my room, changed wallets, to one I just bought...
She came in, and we both napped, from 1800 to 1930.
I woke up, and started doing...
As in, online, checking on pix.
I woke Her up, asking about dinner, and She jumped up, and went to fixing.
I started watching "Archer" while writing my blogs.
She called dinner ready.
The three of us sat at the table for ...oh... ten minutes... eating chili and corn bread, then we went our separate ways, Stitch to his room to watch tv, Her to her computer, in Stitch's room, and me to my room.
I watched more 'Archer" ....
and felt an earthquake rumble through at 2115, about a 5.1, I heard later.
And more "Archer" and I was falling asleep, on a bed with no sheets.
I started watching "King of Queen" reruns, with eyes barely open.
She came in with all the bedcovers, and rather crabbily I readily admit, I helped Her getting them on the bed.
All done...and in bed, sleeping around midnight.
HsLO 86
HsLS 13
Her DO? Yes (twice!)
HsLD 13 1/2
D UN 94
Pictures from 3/27
Lyric for the Day:
You've done me no right
But you've done me some wrong
Left me lonely each night
While I sing my sad song
Quote for the Day:
"What are you thinking, maybe a big musical number?"
from My Manifesto:
I may be required to receive anal penetration, in varying shapes and forms, none of which is intended to inflict permanent harm or injury.
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